Beautiful Things

My head is spinning in many directions, and I know this is when I get lengthy and wordy. Whew.

Taking a breath and going for it.

Today I finally got to open an email a friend sent me over the weekend. It was a song I had never heard before called Beautiful Things. Before I go on, listen to this:

He makes beautiful things out of the dust. He makes beautiful things out of us.

Hope is springing up out of this old ground...Out of chaos, life is being found...in You.

Before I tell you about this weekend full of His "beautiful things"...with these beautiful women...

...I have to show you THIS most beautiful thing that was literally "hope springing out of this old ground".

Thanks to Chet and Sarah Erwin, and their amazing organization Holden Uganda (formed in honor or their precious son, Holden), there are hundreds of people in Uganda drinking clean water. And, one of the newest wells built there has our son's beautiful name on it!! Did you see Chase's name and life verse on this well? Is there anything more beautiful than that?

We have been so blessed this week by this amazing gift, and pray that many more people are given fresh water because of Holden Uganda. If you'd like to donate toward a well, please visit their website!!

And, now, about the weekend...

I had the opportunity to get away from the hustle bustle of life and spend a weekend of quiet rest with nine other mommies who have lost their sweet babies.

Ten women of God, who are desperately trying to follow the Lord, as He redeems and restores...as He heals and guides and brings new life out of the dust. Ten mommies who didn't know what to expect, as we all met for the first time. (I was glad to hear that I wasn't the only one wondering how this was going to go!) But, instead of awkwardness or disconnect, we found lifelong friends in a matter of hours, as we spent time sharing the most intimate details of our walks of grief...of our walks with the Lord...of our dreams for this life we've been given.

I loved the peace I felt this weekend. I was totally completely relaxed. And, totally and completely filled up. It was a beautiful place to get away. And, it just made the perfect environment for letting down your guard and being totally at rest. Isn't it beautiful? (And, most of these awesome pictures are from Tisha, our personal photographer!)

I loved that even though Satan tried to find ways to keep us from coming together (weather, discouragement, illness, flight cancellations), he was unsuccessful. He was defeated, and we were greeted...by a God who was excited to love on us for the weekend. And, let me tell you, I was BLOWN AWAY to see this huge sign on the front gate as I drove up! AMAZING!

After winter weather delays, I was the last to arrive on Friday night, even behind those who came from Canada, Washington, and Michigan! Isn't that crazy?

As soon as I arrived, I was greeted by the girls I was so ready to meet, and I was immediately handed a drink and a comfy place on the couch, as we began listening to the awesome local talent of Lost Creek and worshipping with them. We literally got our own personal concert in the living room!

As we sang songs like Let Your Mercy Rain and I Will Rise, I looked around to see the most beautiful, humble, broken, and receptive hearts in that room. Wow. I told the girls on my couch that I could have worshipped like that all night.

We were all ready for God to move in us and among us, and He most certainly did.

With the help of some amazing people, like the Shuffields and the Selah Springs Ranch, as well as some sweet people from Brady, Texas, we were treated like queens the whole weekend. Not one detail was forgotten. I mean, down to the soap and shampoo selection in each bathroom, the array of yummy snacks, and the s'mores tray by the outdoor fireplace. Absolute hospitality from top to bottom.

We also received two amazing talks from wise women about the walk we are on, and how we can glorify God through it. (I got some very direct messages from God in both of these that I will share later.)

We received amazing meals all weekend, prepared by loving hands who prayed over us, encouraged us, and blessed us through their servant hearts. There were scripture cards all over the lodge, and I smiled every time I found a new one. We even had prayer partners from the Shuffields' church, who committed to praying for us for 30 days. Each girl there received a note from their prayer partner, and it was truly the biggest blessing to me. I plan to use that idea in the future, because it meant so much to each of us.

We had plenty of quiet time in the afternoon to run, walk, explore, or read...guess which one I did. :)

(I have more to say about my quiet time later...God did some important talking during those hours with my Bible!)

Then, when nothing was planned, we spent the time talking and sharing in the most natural of ways.

I loved sitting back and looking around the room at all the smaller conversations taking place. At one time, I would see one small group crying with kleenex in hand, rubbing the back of one friend, or listening intently to one mom's story of grief. Then, at the very same time, another small group would be smiling and laughing and sharing their hearts in another way. It was just so good. It's hard to explain unless you were there.

Every night, we spent until two in the morning talking about anything and everything that you would imagine. We talked about our babies, our husbands, our roads of grief, our families, our friends, our support, our fears, our worries, our surrender. We cried over the pain we've walked through, but we also cried over the amazing ways God has carried us, bringing us to places of deep joy. We talked about the things no one else could understand unless you've said goodbye to your baby this way. We asked the questions and made the remarks that others would think was crazy.

We laughed HARD. We had the best time together and I just kept thinking "How am I this relaxed with these women? How am I saying things so freely to them? How am I laughing so hard with them?"

And, this is why. Because God makes beautiful things out of the dust. He arranged this weekend for us (with the great help of the Shuffields!) and it was so evident in every way. Most of us don't even know exactly how we found each other, which gives full credit to God, who put us where we were for exactly this time and place! And, many of us don't know what is coming next. But, we have no doubt that we will all be connected as it happens.

One thing I really want everyone to be praying for is the newly formed Hope Mommies ministry.

Erin is heading this up, already creating this beautiful logo, and beginning to work feverishly to get a website of encouragement and resources for families who are enduring the grief of losing a baby to stillbirth or other birth complications. She is perfectly gifted for this calling and is going to do amazing things for the women who need to be ministered to in this way. Please join me in praying for God's guidance as this ministry is formed. And, please feel free to forward me info of anyone you know who is needing a group like this. I can already tell it's going to be helpful for so many reasons. And, I can't wait to share it with others!!

As some of us were getting ready to head out on Sunday, we walked down to the river, sat in the middle of the water on huge rocks of granite, and had a time of prayer.

As the sun shone on our faces, and the water rushed beside us, I was overcome once again by His goodness. We have all faced our own "rough waters", yet the Sun continues to shine on us, making something beautiful from our lives and giving us such peace in the middle of it all.

The prayers that were offered up on that rock were amazing. Prayers over future babies, pregnancies, and adoptions. Prayers over future ministries that are being birthed out of the pain and loss, and are now reaching others who need God's love. Prayers over our husbands. Prayers over our roads of surrender. Prayers of thanksgiving for our precious little ones. Oh, it was such a sweet time.

I just love these girls so much, and have not stopped thinking of all that God taught me in the last few days.

I have much more to share, but it's after midnight and my mind is muddled. Thank you, Sarah, Kelly, Erin, Holly, Melissa, MaryBeth, Whitney, Sara, and Lauren (get a blog) for an amazing weekend of encouraging, challenging, and healing conversation.

Praying for each of you daily...

...And thank you, God, that you continue to grow a garden of beauty in the valley so many are walking.