Just today, I took a walk through time, back to those first few weeks of loss again in my mind and heart, as I spent time sharing with a friend who is walking the same devastating road this week. This is not supposed to be the way it happens. And, as I shared with her friend some things that helped me, gifts that blessed me, and scriptures that changed me, I was once again thankful that God knows me and knows exactly what I need.
Even more than that, He knows what my family needs, even when I don't. And, He provides. ALWAYS.
That is the encouragement I was able to offer today. The God who created this whole big world also created YOU. He knows what you need. He knows how to show Himself most clearly to you. And HE WILL. He promises to do so.
What I guess I didn't think about is that God still does that two years after a loss.
I didn't know that we needed a gift like we received last week as much as we did. And, I especially didn't realize how MUCH it would mean to my three girls.
A sweet friend who lost her baby as well has begun working with Molly Bears, this amazing organization that sends weighted teddy bears to families. These teddy bears are beautiful and they weigh exactly what your little one weighed at birth, so you can always feel the weight of them in your arms.
I had no idea I needed that. But, I have LOVED holding my brand new 6 pound, 1 ounce Chase Bear, given to me by Tamberly last week. I can't even believe Chase felt that heavy! But, as I cradled the bear and laid it on my chest, it all came back. :)
But, an even GREATER blessing of this bear is watching the girls open their surprise.
There was LOTS of hugging and cuddling with their new little friend...
I told them as they opened it, that the one thing I will always be sad about, and the one thing I wish I could change more than anything was the fact that they never got to hold their brother. But, now, because of the blessing of a sweet friend, they would get to know what it would have felt like to have him in their arms.
Oh my, I can't even tell you what these moments were like for them. They literally fought over Chase Bear for 24 hours straight (we ended up having to set a timer!), and they never let him out of their sight. It was SO cute.
They each had the same reaction I did when they held him. Here Abby Kate says "He's so heavy!!!" I love that look!
Tamberly, I don't know how to say thank you for knowing just what we needed on this special day.
The Chase Bear is so perfect and already so, so , SO loved. :)
Another gift came too. A friend of Kendyll's who has moved away sent a letter and $87 in cash, that she wanted to give in memory of Chase for helping kids. She had earned the money by baking cakes and wanted to send it all to us. This, too, blew us away and was such a wonderful way to end our day, knowing that others were loving us in this way...and ultimately, loving on the children in need, which is even better!
We are so blessed. Sometimes I feel like I don't say it strong enough, because there aren't words. But, we appreciate you all. I love watching my kids learn firsthand what it means to be a family of Christ. It's the most amazing thing in this world.
Happy, happy Chase Day to you all. And, to my children, both in heaven and on earth. :)
5 comments:
Tears of joy, I knew I would love the photos even before you posted them! I didn't realize I would be crying, I LOVE Abby Kate's face, and Kendyll is such a natural big sister and caregiver, and Carlie is so proud to be holding her baby brothers weight. When you hear the Lord speak to your heart listen to Him, for he is ready to use you. Right hear is why I am so thankful to be apart of Molly Bears, who knew that a simple gift, a teddy bear, could bring healing to sister's longing to hold their baby brother, and parents that need to be reminded of how that precious baby felt in their arms. Love you Jacob's family! ~Tamberly
An absolutely brilliant idea! I remember commenting about how heavy he felt and to see the girls able to enjoy that moment in this way is s true blessing. Thankful!!
How precious. What an incredible gift! Thank you for sharing your family with me and so many others. You are such an encouragement in ways you will never even know.
We are waiting foe our Molly Bear too! I can't wait to remember what it felt like to hold her in our arms! I am glad you for your bear on Chase's special day!
Wow! What an amazing idea to do with those bears. Really, really cool. Kelly
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