The Jacobs Journal

Days Away...and a New Dog

2012-01-25T23:46:00.010-06:00

So, there are quite a few exciting things around here. I'm not able to share them all quite yet. But, here are the first three...enough for tonight. :)

1) I am getting the wonderful opportunity to spend this weekend in Atlanta at the Created 4 Care Retreat for adoptive moms.

I don't even think I realize yet how MUCH I need this. It's going to be such a blessing, and I know I will get to sit with so many moms I respect and admire, and I will come back refreshed and encouraged and challenged and hopeful...and READY to have my baby home!!!!

But, sadly, this gift of getting away is not because I signed up in the first 4 minutes, like 400 other moms did. Because I actually didn't. I never even planned on going.

But, my sweet, dear friend, Heather, who DID sign up months ago, found out heartbreaking news right before Christmas....that her mom has cancer. And, she can now not go to the conference she was signed up for.

She has so graciously offered me her place. And, I am so grateful for the opportunity to be there, although I wish she wasn't walking through this, and I wish she was still getting to be at Created 4 Care instead of me.

{Will you PLEASE join me in praying for Heather and her family, and especially her sweet mom? Thank you.}

2) And the very NEXT weekend, I am leaving again {this is not a usual thing for this homebody mommy!} for the second annual Hope Mommies retreat!

You may remember this awesome blessing from last year, where I spent 3 days with other moms who have had to say goodbye to their babies here on earth, and hold on to the hope of seeing them again someday in heaven. So, this year I know that God has big things in store for all of us, as we worship together, talk together, remember together, and hope together. Erin, my friend and hero, and creator and founder of Hope Mommies, has been hard at work putting together an incredible weekend, and I can hardly wait to hug these dear women.

I don't consider it to be a "good thing" to have 3 new mommies who are personal friends or friends from ACU joining me this year. It's not a good thing to have said goodbye to your sweet baby. But, I am feeling blessed that we will have this time to visit, uninterrupted, and just rest and relax and share our hearts in this beautiful, quiet place.

I am leading a breakout group for mommies who have other children at home, and I look so forward to this time together! It is my prayer that from the healing God has given me, I will be able to share with others who are hurting so. Thank you, Lord, that you bring beauty from ashes.

{Please be praying for the Hope Mommies who will be gathered for this time away too!}

3. And....exciting event #3!! WE GOT A NEW DOG!!!

To those who knew our "old Annie girl", as she is now called, you know that she could never ever be replaced. (These pics are from the day we had to say goodbye...)

She was the perfect dog for us, and was loved and adored by her three girls.

Annie took such good care of our kids, and was with us for 10 years. After putting her to sleep in August, we had really decided we were okay with having no dog. {Okay, Mark and I decided that. The girls were never on board.}

But, I had a short lapse in judgment and got on Golden Retriever Rescue's site about a month ago, just to SEE what might be there. And, that's where I saw her.

Annie.

I mean, not only did she look JUST like her. Her name REALLY was Annie.

But, this idea was met with a quick "NO" from the hubby. So, I dropped it and never told the girls.

Fast forward to last week. Kendyll and Carlie are flipping through a big book on animals during our lunch break, and they decide to google pictures of each one. Well, they google "Golden Retrievers", and what do you think comes up?

Golden Retriever Rescue.

And, I'm sure you know what happened next.

Kendyll starts squealing and jumping and yelling "Mommy, mommy, mommy!" To which I calmly and sweetly say "Yes, dear?" Ha ha. Not really. I told her to calm down or I wouldn't listen. :)

She starts telling me about Annie. "She is 8 years old, Mom. She loves kids, she is housetrained, she looks JUST like our old Annie, and she has SEIZURES, MOM!"

Umm, okay.

"Mom, she NEEDS a home. She has SEIZURES! We have to get her!"

We go downstairs to eat lunch and Mark joins us for a bit. They start telling Daddy all about it. And, it quickly goes south. He starts lecturing about the needs of a dog...who will scoop the poop?...do you know how much dog food costs?...we don't need another dog...you know, GUY responses. Just about anything you can think of that totally puts a damper on the whole idea.

And, as you can imagine with three girls who are desperately wanting a new puppy to LOVE...the tears start flowing.

I mean, red streaked faces, puffy eyes, and gasps for breath kind of cries. Kendyll even went and hid in her closet, she was so upset.

So, Mark talked to his almost TEN year old about this response and asked her if she thought this would be the way to get a dog. She realized that this probably wasn't the most effective strategy and she re-grouped---with her sisters---after apologizing to Daddy for being out of control.

They spent the next 3 hours in Kendyll's room. We were told we could not come out of our bedroom until they said so.

And, when we came out, I was just blown away with what I saw. I started laughing hysterically when I saw this hobo village for dogs that had been created, complete with cardboard signs.

"We are so sad. We need homes. We are starving. No one loves us. Please help the puppies. Poor little guys. Have a heart." {my personal favorite}

All the dogs were inside the boxes with wadded up trash, empty water bowls and no food.

Then, the program starts.

Carlie sings "Amazing Grace". Kendyll sings "Jesus is Tenderly Calling". Abby Kate sings "Please oh please can we have Annie". I really can't even express the hilarity of it all. We did video the entire thing, so we'll never forget. :)

Oh, and I didn't mention that they wore prom clothes for the presentation. Complete with tiaras.

Then, Kendyll read the speech written by the three girls, all about what it means for an orphaned dog to find a home. She appealed to her parents' hearts with the whole orphaned and abandoned thing first. Then, she explained why Annie should be our puppy and how they will take care of her, and what an opportunity this is for them to show responsibility. They even offered to buy the dog food.

HILARIOUS! And, there was a poster--that still hangs in our living room---where OLD ANNIE herself endorsed this adoption!

Her paw print and signature was included. :)

I had to rush out to a meeting, but Mark was left with the end of the show, and with the decision of what to do next. He knew what I would say. {YES.}

So, next thing I know, I get a text from Kendyll:

Online adoption application is done!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We WANT ANNIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The next day we were contacted by the rescue center, and three days later, we had our adoption appointment.

The Batchelors got to join us for the meeting, and it was love at first sight for EVERYONE.

There were tears of joy from Carlie, as she met her new Annie Girl.

It has been so fun to watch these girls just love on Annie, and become her best friends in just a matter of days.

She looks SO much like our old Annie, that it's almost freaky. And, the whole same name thing is just CRAZY!

But, some things are different. Like the seizures. This is something we didn't expect, since they told us she hadn't had any since the first week the foster family had her (two months ago). So far, she's had one every day she's been at our house.

I have alot more to share about that later...it has been a deeper experience for me than just caring for a dog. But, that is a whole other post.

I have learned alot from this little orphaned dog. It is so obvious she was abandoned and lived on the streets. She is nervous. She is fearful. She likes very small spaces where a Golden Retriever should not fit. And, she is desperate for love. As in, she does not leave my side.

I've really had some amazing realizations in the first 3 days with our little Annie, and I've actually thanked God for this little preparation He has provided for all 5 of us. We know this is "just a dog", but it has truly been deeper lessons than that for us...for what is coming into our lives sometime {hopefully} soon. More to come on that.

For now, I will close. And, go pack. And, go love on the dog who is sitting at my feet even as I type. :)

A New System

2012-01-19T14:17:00.000-06:00

So...it's pretty funny how you can blog about "unknowns" in life and talk about how cool they are, and how excited you are about them. And, how it's so obvious that God is bringing you into a whole YEAR of unknowns, for which you will be very grateful.

And, then, you know, ONE day later, when the unknowns start happening FULL FORCE, and all of a sudden, I'm praying and begging God to just WAIT a minute and let me get a breath!! :)

It's all SUCH great stuff. All stuff that Mark and I have been praying for. And, some of it is has served as a good kick in the pants from God.

And, yes, I know I'm talking in code. Sorry. It is all His Chase and orphan related. That narrows it down for you, I know.

MEANWHILE...

While some of the exciting unknowns continue to play out in our lives, I am just going to share something easy and mindless and predictable:

OUR NEW RESPONSIBILITY STATIONS!!

It's a new year, and a new system is in place at our house: Responsibility Stations from Fisher Kids! What's funny is I actually bought the kits in September. Then, they sat at the pickup location for three months.

Fall was busy, what can I say.

But, even though it took me months to get going on it, it has been an awesome fit for our family.

Before this station idea came about, we were doing our own version of this, using Chore Charts from Homeschool Creations, which are also WONDERFUL (and easy to just print out!)

The concepts behind the two versions are very similar, and are definitely lessons we want our kids to learn:

1) They have responsibilities in our home because they live in our home. Not because they get paid for them, or because they get rewards for doing them. They help with chores because we are a family and we all contribute to taking care of what God has given us. (I believe it also gives children VALUE to be included even in work. They know they are important and they are needed in the family and they learn that they are hardworking, dependable, etc.)

2) We should be happy and thankful to work together, and we honor God for what He has given us and for how He takes care of us, whether that is by helping make drinks at dinner or making our bed in the morning or picking up the crayons for the sixteenth time that day.

3) I want my girls to run their own homes someday with joy, discipline, and knowledge of how to do things! So, I really like seeing them learning to do laundry, clean a toilet, or cook a meal! I jokingly tell them all the time that they'll get to do these things their whole life long! Isn't that exciting?!!

3) We also want our kids learning about how to manage the money God gives us, believing first and foremost that it is ALL HIS. And, every dollar we spend or save or give matters. (I'm learning this lesson alongside them, actually!!!)

So, basically, I just want to say that the responsibility station is SO COOL. And, the kids agree!!!

They each have their own board, which has a list of expected responsibilities for each child.

They also have a specific number of chores to complete each day, which are drawn from their chore stick bucket each morning before breakfast.

Each night they turn their sticks in, and write down their "commission" for doing their work on the attached notepad. (Have I mentioned that I LOVE that everything is attached and included on one little board? It is SO NICE.)

And, I love that this is all their responsibility to complete. There is no nagging or reminding (after the first week or so) and it takes my emotion out of it.

At the end of the week, they total their amounts from each day and bring it to us for their paycheck.

Then, they place the money they have earned in the three bags: Give It, Save It, Spend It.

Another thing I love about Fisher Kids is the idea that "save it" is not saving for a big item they want for themselves. It's saving for college, or a mission trip someday, or to help with the expense of a car when they start to drive. These are BIG things that they should already begin contributing toward!

Mark has been really wanting to get all of them personal savings accounts, which he did with them the week after Christmas. So, now their favorite thing to do is fill out their little deposit form and take their "save it" money to the bank.

And, the "Give It" bag gives them some ownership in what organizations they would like to support. They give some of it to church, and then get to decide where the rest goes. So far, His Chase is winning, but Kendyll has also chosen to give extra amounts to our Compassion kids too.

I love that this whole system works to teach them life long lessons about managing your time, taking care of what you've been given, and being responsible for your money.

And, by having their own little "stations", they are THRILLED to do the tasks and feel like it's fun!

And, honestly, the best part of all? I didn't have to prepare any of this. It came as an entire KIT, even down to the sharpie pen to write it with!

So, even though I really don't usually do "product review" blogs, I just had to share these new systems with my friends. They really are worth the investment and will WORK with very little arm-twisting or lecturing needed! :)

A New Year of Unknowns

2012-01-13T14:53:00.007-06:00

I love looking back and seeing how God keeps changing me. He's so patient, really, with my heart that continues to wander. It has been a slow journey. But, He's continuing to make some progress in my old soul.

I'm not really one that loves the unknown, typically.

But, what I love is that God has slowly taught me to rest in it. I think this has come over time, as He has proven to me that He works His most amazing miracles in my life when I've been right smack in the middle of the "unknown".

And, this is the thing: I'm finally starting to realize that it's in the NOT-knowing, that the ALL-Knowing can take me on the most wild and exciting ride---and it's exciting not because I know what is coming next, but because I don't have to!!

Last January 1st, I rang in the New Year in the middle of Ethiopia with my fellow travelers on a Visiting Orphans trip.

Three days later, I landed in Rwanda, a dream come true, but never expecting what would come from that trip.

(This will forever be one of my favorite pictures, hours after we landed in Rwanda, where I was already crying and crying, because it felt like home. Powerful moment for me...and I got to cry in my {delicious Rwandan} food with one of my favorite people in the world. :)

I didn't know then that I would love it like I did. Or, that it would feel like home so quickly. I fell in love with the land, the hills, the beauty. But, even more so, with the people, the children, the orphans, and the great sense of family, even among those who have none to call their own.

{Vestine at 4 months old, when I first beheld her beauty :) }

I look back at texts I sent Mark in early January, and I smile. God was doing a new thing in us, yet again, but it was all completely unknown. 2011 was going to be a good year, I felt it in my bones even then. Even though I had no idea what the rest of the year would bring, the Lord was giving me a tiny inkling---a little whisper---of what He had planned. Not enough to plan for, but just enough to rest in.

"I'm a crying mess. But it's all for good reason. I just get overwhelmed by what God is doing with us." - text on Jan. 8

"Didn't get to tell you everything tonight, but I think God may be presenting our next project and it's an awesome one...Just dreaming, of course, but we need to start praying. Can't wait to see what God will do next!" - text on Jan. 11

And, here we are, exactly a year later, and are able to look back at the story God is just beginning to weave. Mark returned to Rwanda two months later, in March of 2011, and we returned with our first His Chase trip of 40 volunteers (including our children!) in July.

His Chase projects were begun and trips were planned, projects were finished and trips were completed. Our hearts broke in new ways for His children who deserve so much more than they have. And new children became our own, even though they live a continent away. Our hearts will never be the same.

Our family has changed.

Our children have changed.

Our marriage has changed.

Our faith has changed.

And, no, it wasn't all while in Africa. There's a whole lot that happens in the daily living of life that changes us too. He has been faithful to us in both.

And, I think this is important to note: This doesn't mean it was a perfect year. There were lots of junky days. Lots of days that I wasn't a good mommy, or a good friend, or a good listener to what the Lord was telling me. Lots of days of doubts, or worry, or wonder about what God could possibly be thinking! And lots of days where the struggle between what I wanted and what I knew had to be were downright painful.

And none of it we knew anything about last year at this time.

Whether it was in a foreign country, in the middle of homeschool, or on a vacation with family, He was constantly surprising us, and using even the hard times to show us His bigger plan.

And, it makes me more excited than I can stand, as we enter 2012!!

What will it be this year, God? How will you change us even more? How will you stretch us? Grow us? Open our eyes to Your will and Your ways? How will you even use our disappointments and our struggles and our bad days to bring glory to You?

Will it be new projects, new trips, new opportunities to fall in love with orphaned children we don't know yet? (Please, Lord!) Will it be adding to our family through the miracle of adoption, after years of praying? (Let it be so!!) Will we get to return to Ghana and Rwanda, to shower love on those we miss and love? (Ready to GO!) Will it be a new ministry that we don't even know you are forming in us now? (We're saying yes!)

Whatever it looks like, we are so excited for 2012. And, the most fun part of all is that we have no idea why! Only God knows what is ahead, but it feels like new things are on the horizon, and we are waiting with great expectation!

So, I don't really have big resolutions again this new year. I just have one goal. To be comfortable in the unknown. To be okay with seeing only one little step in front of me at a time. Because after all those little steps, I'll be able to look back---NO MATTER WHAT---at the end of this year and say "God was faithful to lead us!"

"I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in His word I hope. My soul waits for the Lord more than watchmen for the morning." Ps. 130

"For still the vision awaits its appointed time...if it seems slow, wait for it. It will surely come, it will not delay...the righteous shall live by faith."

And, I thought this was so perfectly timed, read at just the right time, in Streams in the Desert this morning:

"This is the blessed life---not anxious to see far down the road nor overly concerned about the next step, nor eager to choose the path nor weighted down with the heavy responsibilities of the future, but quietly following the Shepherd, one step at a time."

Bring it on, God! We're ready for 2012: A New Year of Unknowns!!!

Christmas 2011

2012-01-12T17:33:00.022-06:00

As I mentioned before, we are blessed by a BIG family. And, because of that blessing, we have Christmas all month long. In an effort to put them all in one big ol' post, I've named them all...

1. Santa Sweaters & California Christmas

Every year, we get together with Mark's extended family from California, as well as cousins from Denver and Florida.

For the last few years, we've developed some pretty fun traditions, most of which involve eating.

So, this year, while Babe's still made the cut for the family dinner, we added a new twist: Ugly Christmas Sweaters. It was quite hilarious to go out as a family in some absurd outfits, and laugh at each other's finds. Mark was determined to find our family's outfits at a true thrift store for as cheap as possible. (Did you know that there really is a market for these ugly sweaters? If you have old ones in your closet, you could be holding on to hundreds of dollars!) Anyway, he was very proud to purchase 5 sweaters for our family for under $27. And, he informed me on his way home that mine was "two-piece". WHAT? I found out soon that mine had a matching skirt. And, it gets worse. I actually owned it 20 something years ago. Yes, I did.

And, Mark wore a cross-stitched Nutcracker vest with turtleneck. And, the turtleneck had a holly leaf and berries embroidered on it. I couldn't stop laughing when I looked at him!

Anyway, it was a fun family night, and we even got to vote on our favorites. Best Girl Sweater award came to yours truly. I'm so proud. Best Guy Sweater went to Pops, with his girly button-up, and best Kid Sweater went to Sophie. She was very deserving as well. And, the best overall Ugly Christmas Sweater went to the man who thought of it all: Uncle Chris. Complete with a turtleneck dickey with a jingle bell on it. WOW. Here are all the winners in our victory picture.

It was a fun weekend just hanging out with the family we don't get to see enough. We scratched plenty of lottery tickets (Uncle Joe's awesome gift each year) and we ended up with $57 for our family! That is BY FAR a record for us!

2. Holiday Hunting!

We celebrated Christmas Eve Day with Grandad and Grankay, with a DELICIOUS spread of food and the kids' usual tradition of hunting for their gifts. They receive a wrapping paper pattern (or two for the older ones!), and they get busy discovering what is theirs under the tree.

It is HARD work, as you can see.

They have to think hard,

carry heavy loads,

and try to navigate their way behind piles of presents.

But, boy is it fun when they achieve their goals!

Even Brewer looks excited about the challenge!

(And, Mark and I may have found a few other times to cuddle this little man. OH, how I love him!!)

And, this is also what I love. This room full of craziness, with so many cousins and sisters and grandparents...mass Christmas chaos. :)

Grandad and Grankay always do such a good job of finding the perfect things for the kids, and they were all squealing left and right at their surprises. They also gave all of us a date night gift card, which is HIGHLY appreciated!! And, I really wish I had a picture of the stained glass cross my grandparents gave us. (See them there in the middle?)

My grandfather made it by hand and carved Chase Allen in the top. Means the world to me! And, I stare at it every day over my kitchen sink now.

3. Feasting and Fountains

On to Pops and Grandma's house! And, oh my, did we FEAST!! Uncle Chris was the chef this year, with Grandma's assistance. And, they are one amazing team. We had the most delicious meal and were stuffed to the brim. It is always fun to see what Chris creates, and this one had to be his best ever!

And, of course, we got more fun cousin time! I just feel so blessed that my girls are growing up with so many cousins as their most favorite friends. And, they are all the perfect playmates for being SUpEr SiLLy!!

We were amazed this year that posing for the Pops and Grandma Christmas picture was actually easy! The kids are growing up! Even the dog cooperated. This might be a first.

And, the chocolate fountain tradition continued again!

Every year, Pops surprises us with some disgusting food to dip in the chocolate first. And, this year was a BRUSSEL SPROUT! YUCK! The kids get a kick out of this, and then we all dive in with our bananas, strawberries, pretzels, and cream puffs. My stomach is growling even as I type it!

We returned the next morning for gifts, and the girls were once again pleased with more big wishes coming true. Carlie got the Madame Alexander dolls she had been DREAMING of, and was so incredibly happy (and still is!)

Kendyll is just getting WAY too old, and her gifts have grown up too. She got her first pair of earrings (to be used in just a couple months, when she turns 10!) and she was beside herself about her special silver jewelry box, and is hoping to put it to good use as the years go on.

And, after opening her fun gifts, Abby Kate spent her time playing with Ty's superhero dress-up. That girl cracks me up! :) And, I of course have no pictures of her!

Aunt Jodi and Uncle Brad have started a collection of ornaments for the girls, and this year, they were excited to see what years they got on their candy canes!

So many thoughtful things given and so many blessings poured out on us. Whew.

4. Noel Night's Nice Nativity

Our next stop was east Texas for a trip to Gammy and Papa Ron's on Christmas night! It was a great getaway and was perfect timing for some yucky weather...because it forced us all to just be still and hang out, drinking coffee, playing games, catching up, eating, and staying in pajamas all day.

We were originally hoping to get to camp out or do a bonfire breakfast with our new family tent we got from Gammy and Papa Ron (!!), but the day "off" was pretty good too!

We also decided this was the year to finally start a nativity play with the cousins, after talking about it for a couple of years. First of all, we had the cutest baby Jesus EVER. (He was fed well in utero.)

And, all the kids were great ages to play the parts and understand what they were doing...and they were SO CUTE!!

We had our narrator, who told the Christmas story, complete with Christmas carols sung throughout.

The most beautiful angel, Avery, who was very good at flapping her angel wings.

Then, we had Mary and Joseph, who were quite the pair.

They prayed, and the angel came to each of them...

Then, the shepherd (aka Caleb) came to visit with his "sheep", Ruby, Pearl, and Tobias.

The wise man (AK) kept being called a "wise woman" and she (I mean he) did NOT like this. So, (s)he insisted that I put the hair in a bun so "everyone would know she was a boy". She took this job VERY seriously.

She brought her purple sparkly Caboodle treasure box and laid it at the manger. And, I really did almost cry. She was so excited to give her gift to Jesus. Even though it was a funny thing to us, they really did such a good job with their parts.

And, the homemade costumes (well, really, they can't even be called costumes. They all came from a cardboard box full of dress-up accessories!) made it even cuter.

They ended with the whole group circled around Baby Jesus, singing Away in a Manger.

Oh, I could eat them all up!!

It is definitely a tradition we will continue. :)

The cousins also exchanged books as their gifts this year, and we sisters were a little worried that they might think this was lame. But, it was THE sweetest thing to see them all group up around the house and start reading together.

It made the aunts so happy to see this. :)

5. Cousin Christmas Continues!

And, THEN, after east Texas time, it was time to go west! After a couple of days, we headed to Abilene to see Aunt Carol and Uncle Chuck, and the Abilene cousins!

More wonderful meals and family time + cousin dress-up and slumber party + another year of fun Chinese gift exchange fights {I mean, gift giving} + time to sit and soak in Christmas = NO PICTURES to show for it! I can't explain it. I was just in relaxation mode.

Okay, there was one cute cousin shot! :)

So, there it is! Jacobs Family Christmas 2011.

We came home to welcome in a New Year, and we look forward to what 2012 will bring! We're praying it brings more opportunities for service through His Chase, a trip or two to Africa, and a new addition to our family!!! Praying always for God to continue breaking our hearts for what breaks His, and allowing us to join in---even deeper---with Him as He rescues and redeems the broken of this world.

We hope you have all had a wonderful holiday season, and are ready for what the new year will bring for YOUR family! Love you all!

Merry Christmas Eve-Eve!

2012-01-08T14:35:00.011-06:00

Since we always spend the week of Christmas seeing lots of family, we decided to do our Christmas with the girls a couple of days early. They, of course, totally agreed to this plan, since that meant Santa came early too. :) The funniest part of this was how many times we heard the phrase "Christmas Eve-Eve", as in "the night before Christmas Eve". This all of a sudden became an important day! And, it definitely was a Merry Christmas Eve-Eve!

The girls started their day with a tea party at Grandma's, while we finished last minute preparation. Then, we had a family dinner at the Japanese Hibachi grill. This is one of our favorite "special treat" restaurants, and it was fun to dress up and celebrate.

Then we headed to the candlelight Christmas service at church, which was the most wonderful way to start our Christmas Eve Eve. :)

I was in tears as we sang the verses of Away in a Manger, as I thought about our sweet child...somewhere in Rwanda, and all the others who I love across the world."Bless all the dear children in Thy tender care..." Oh, my heart. I am so ready to have our little one here...I am thankful, though, to know that he or she IS in His care. It's the only way I can keep waiting...and waiting...and waiting. "And fit us for heaven, to live with Thee there." And, I want to go there too, to see my other little one! As usual, my heart is in so many places. :)

After church, we came home to get ready for Christmas morning! Yes, they are all "over" the matching PJ's thing. But, for Christmas night, they still have to do what I say. Ha.

And, of course, we had to have a "Mousey Nutcracker" pose. Littlest sister is obsessed.

After they went to bed, Santa got busy unloading the car from a Goodwill trip. Yes, Santa shopped thrift stores this year...you'll see why.

As of three days before, Santa actually had no plan for the Jacobs house. There was nothing the girls were asking for, and there was nothing that Santa was really wanting to get. Except for one thing. I really wanted an old-fashioned playhouse for the backyard. These three girls spend HOURS pretending to either live in the land of Narnia, or Little House, or Sound of Music. So, I kept wanting some place they could have all their make-believe fun. But, every single one we found on Craig's List was either too expensive, or a little too used. And, the new kits aren't exactly easy to put together (for us, anyway!), especially with three days to work with.

So, we had given up. But, then Daddy came to the rescue! He looked one more time on Craig's List and saw a brand new house, marked down for a Christmas clearance! When we asked more about it, assuming there had to be a catch, we found out the guy built it himself (he builds houses and builds one playhouse a year, which for some reason didn't sell this year!) AND he could deliver it that day. SCORE!!

So, the real reason we decided to go with an early Christmas, was because the Santa gift this year was a surprise...to all of us! And, it was delivered early, and was a little bit hard to hide.

It was delivered and set up, and then Mommy kind of got the itch to have some things to go in it. I know, I know. The gift WAS the house. My co-Santa said that a zillion times. But, one trip to Goodwill, and one trip to TJ Maxx, and we were stocked with old silver trays, pots and pans, teacups, baskets, and rugs for literally a few dollars. Mark even got the itch and went to an antique store all by himself, to see what he could find. He called me so excited because he found an old pie safe and an antique scale. It was fun to watch him explain them to the girls and be just as "into" the old stuff as I was.

The big reveal was so fun. And, after waiting oh-so-patiently...

they ran down to find their surprise.

We could have stopped there. They were so excited to have old baskets and silverware. But, after reading Santa's poem, they realized there was something else in the backyard.

And, the rest can be told in pictures.

Time to move in!

The decorating alone made this mommy happy.

They loved every minute of it and were in character before 10 minutes had passed.

And, of course, they have been wearing the place out ever since. In fact, the other night, we let them stay in until after dark, and they are hoping to sleep in it sometime this next week. (Once we get the lantern fixed!)

It's my favorite kind of Christmas gift...one that makes millions of sister memories.

After the reveal, it was time for presents! Sister gifts are always the highlight, and they could not WAIT to show what they had made/bought for each other.

And, the usual reactions were given.

I've said this every year, but it's my favorite part, as they each think for weeks about what their sister would want most, and then scurry around sneakily, wrapping and crafting.

This year, Kendyll made her sisters their own bulletin boards, which were a big hit!

Carlie got Abby Kate remote control race cars, which got a huge tackle hug...

and Abby Kate went with a ballet theme for her big sisters. They were VERY happy.

We had a couple of surprise gifts for Daddy, including new socks, a cool homemade crown and a "colorful rainbow" made by Abby Kate.

And, when we saw this painting at TJ Maxx, all three girls squealed and said "It's VESTINE!!" So, we had to get it for Mark Daddy Daddy. :)

Thanks to a good friend, we found the perfect "clothes" gift! From a store called Naartjie...shirts with the continent of Africa on the front! SO AWESOME!!

And, their other special gift were these ADORABLE, SWEET look-alike dolls made by our friend, Shannon. They love their little mini-me's! (Check out Shannon's Etsy shop HERE. She is so talented and creative!!)
So, that sums up our Christmas with the girls! After the morning together, we began the tour of family homes, and had time with all of our grandparents, cousins, aunts and uncles for days and days! Christmas is always full to the brim for us, and even though there are days where exhaustion takes over, I always try to stop and look around--past all the wrapping paper and car trips--and see blessing after blessing of loving family.

So, one more Christmas blog is still on its way! Whew!

Counting Down to Christmas

2012-01-05T22:49:00.010-06:00

Since I never did get this blog post written when it was actually pre-Christmas, I won't go into everything I wanted to say a few weeks ago. (I'm sure you're glad.)

I'll just say I had a really hard time with the entry into Christmas. It's getting harder every year to see the craziness that this world turns our Christmas into. And, to watch how quickly we all get caught up in making the season busy. How is it so easy to slip into that pattern of filling every single minute with activity? I've been guilty of it for years. And, it's really starting to wear on me.

So, I'm already hoping that next December, we'll be off of school all month. Off from school. Off from shopping. We're just going to soak it in. And, spend time at home. Now, I'll just have to remind myself next year that I said all of this.

Anyway, I said I wasn't going to go on and on. So, I'll wait til next Christmas to talk about how much I despise retail shopping, Elf on the Shelf, and the fast pace of this city. I bet you can't wait for that post. :)

The month of December did go by way too fast, and many of our good intentions went undone. Not many pictures were taken, and even those that were, are not the best. But, we did have fun! And, we did try to stop each day to just be together. (Laying on the couch reading Christmas books seemed to be my favorite way to do this!)

And, we tried to focus our countdown time on the absolute amazing gift Jesus was to this world. We're pretty blessed to have the crafty ability of my sister, Cassie, and she was kind to make us a set of these ornaments. (I told you my pictures are bad!)

The names of Jesus. We celebrated one each day, and read scripture about whatever name we were studying.

The names of Jesus make me cry every year, as I am reminded of how HUGE it is that Jesus came, and that He is the fulfillment of every need we have, and the answer to every prayer prayed for hundreds of years. And, He is the victory we need to be able to leave this yucky world someday and spend EVERY day like Christmas, celebrating the One who gave it all for us.

We also did our traditional advent box, (of which I have no pictures), which apparently Abby Kate remembered very well from past years! She was in charge of this every day, and LOVED getting to hang the next silver ornament, and pass out the chocolate kisses to the sisters.

Now, this is a side note. But, this is one of the first years that I have truly enjoyed our Christmas decorations, not because of what they mean to me, but because of what they mean to the girls. There were so many smiles as we unpacked each little part--many things I didn't even realize were a big deal to them--and it made me so thankful for the traditions of family.

We got to do some new things with friends this year to celebrate the season, that were fun for our family too. We went caroling with our homeschool group from church, and made some gifts for family with them as well.

We had some impromptu dinners out with close family friends, and surprise sleepovers too!

(cheeseburgers, Starbucks, & Christmas lights from the bed of the truck with the Batchelors.)

(Sleepover with Caroline...the girls decided to go caroling in the neighborhood with their matching Pj's. :)

Our piano teacher organized a "mini" piano recital at a nursing home in town just days before Christmas, which was enjoyed by all.

Abby Kate has started playing piano this year, and she was very proud to finally play Jingle Bells and Up On the Housetop for an audience. :)

They gave her great applause, as you can tell by the uneasy smile.

And, we had the best time listening to the stories of the sweet people there. They were truly inspirational to us! It's the perfect place to go to get the right perspective on this season!!

And, this is a sweet picture Mark got of Carlie loving on one of her sweet new friends.

This is a really big deal for our Carlie girl. Every day, I see her blossoming into a more confident girl, and I'm so thankful she is more and more willing to share her love with others. This would not have been a picture we could have taken even a year ago. She is growing SO MUCH! And, I love being on the front row watching God work in her heart.

The girls also had a fun day with Grandma and Sophie, for a tea party, craft time, and Christmas fun, all in PJ's!

Which was the perfect way to start Christmas week, while Mom & Dad spent time getting gifts ready...and moving a big (and very bright) yellow surprise into our backyard for Christmas!! More to come on that little addition next!

Christmas Time in Chunks

2012-01-05T21:55:00.009-06:00

I just laughed as I wrote "chunks" in the title. Because even though I meant it as "small pieces of information given over a few different entries", the word still makes me think of only one thing (puking). :) And, ironically, it's a pretty appropriate word for this time of year. The idea of blogging about an entire December worth of happenings on January 5th will resemble a regurgitation of sorts!

So, here we go!

One of the most important things in the world for our girls is Nutcracker each year. This year seems to have outlasted years past, because there has literally not been one day in the last two months that six little feet have not danced the Nutcracker ballet across our living room floor. In fact, I have had to set a limit on it, and say "No Nutcracker during the school day". Of course, it doesn't totally work, because they still flit and twirl and do all kinds of fancy French word moves even when they take a bathroom break!

But, of course, I love it. And, I smile each time they do it.

Even just tonight, as I cooked dinner, I looked in to see Kendyll teaching Abby Kate new parts of a dance they made up, which they performed for me as we sat down to eat. I just LOVE their love of ballet.

And, I know that we have many years to come. (That may or may not sound like a good thing to our wonderful families who come to see them perform multiple times a year!!)

This year's Nutcracker was another fun time. Lots of practice. Lots of hours of rehearsal. Lots of hours driving in the car. LOTS of Starbucks. And, lots of anticipation!

But, all worth it to see these beauties smiling with pride and accomplishment.

And, to see them having a blast with all their Nutcracker friends!

And to see the Nutcracker five times! Oh wait, that might not be my favorite part. :)

As usual, they appreciated the support of family and friends, although we missed quite a bit of our family this year. We gave them all excused absences because it was for a great reason! Uncle Adam (my sister's husband) and his highschool football team made it to the Semifinals for football!! So, we had to send off the rest of the fam to cheer him on for us!

We did have sweet friends who came to cheer for Kendyll and Carlie, and that always means so much.

And, of course, they got lots of kisses and hugs and cheers from Pops and Grandma,

Aunt Cassie,

Aunt Jodi,

And Miss Sophie Lynn!

Of course, we can't forget their BIGGEST cheerleader of all, Abby Kate! She is counting down the months 'til she can join the Nutcracker cast. But, for now, she is her big sisters' BIGGEST fan! (Although she WAS ready to skip a show or two by the end of the weekend!)

She decided to make them special muffins for breakfast before their first performance...ALL BY HERSELF! The only thing I was allowed to do was help her spoon them into the muffin tins. Love that girl's determination. :) And, her sisters loved that girls' muffin skills!

She also picked each of them a Nutcracker ornament and flower bouquet, which she could hardly wait to give either!

She is a sweet little sister, and I always love watching her following after her big sisters in so many ways. Precious to me.

So, since the girls are already talking about their roles for next year, and practicing them every night, it looks like we'll have a whole year full of Nutcracker fun!

I Needed That

2011-12-08T18:10:00.010-06:00

Sometimes I'm glad to find old pictures on the camera when I dump them all on the computer.

Because things I've forgotten, are brought to mind again.

And, many times, there are pictures I didn't even realize I had...thanks to little hands who pick up the camera and snap away.

As I downloaded pictures last night, of what I thought was Nutcracker from last weekend, my camera said "236 pictures downloading". Ummm, what?? It should be like 50?

What I didn't remember is the day my girls took the camera outside (with permission!) to do a photo shoot together. I never heard much about it, except a few things overheard between them about how pretty their dolls looked.

So, last night, I was quite surprised to find their {numerous} still-life images captured on camera.

And, right in the midst of a crazy, busy week, I just stopped and stared at each one, realizing for a minute what it was like to be a child. They notice the little things. And, they take time to capture it.

I don't do that enough. And, I sure needed that time, just looking through things that happened weeks and weeks ago on a afternoon of sister-bonding outside. (probably while Mommy took a nap on the couch!)

There were a few that surprised me (it was the doll face in the bushes. a little creepy.)

And, some that made me smile. (man, she's getting big.)

And, then many that made me laugh out loud.

But, then, a whole series of tree pictures that took my breath away.

My girls LOVE nature. In fact, Kendyll said just yesterday that she just feels "all cooped up" with this cold weather, and she just needs some time in nature. (This was a plea to go out and explore the pioneer village in 30 degree weather.) Love that girl.

She's the one that took pictures like these:

And, I love that this one day in fall is now documented forever. A day that I probably would have missed altogether, or just seen as another school day full of subjects and lessons, and obviously a nap for the tired mommy. :)

So glad God made children to explore and create and appreciate. It inspires me.

Then...on the same "236 picture download", there was another surprise!

I never blogged about Abby Kate's fall program! Surprise!! How could I forget about sharing my little owl with all of you! How sad!

Do they not just make you smile? That little sea of owl faces?

Can you tell which one is my little hoot-hoot owl...right in the middle!!

She did a great job (and was just as excited as last time about getting to be the center of attention for our little family.)

She had to show each one of us her work and we were not allowed to look away or miss any part!

Her big sister was SO proud of her and told her again and again how great she was doing.

I know, firsthand, how much an oldest sisters words can matter, for good and for bad. So, I told Kendyll later what powerful encouragement she is giving to her littlest sis. :) (Now, there are many days, we have the opposite conversation...about the words that discourage and tear down...one I also give because I know it firsthand.)

ANYWAY, that's another blog for another time!

Here she is with her sweet, oh-so-loved teacher, Mrs. Marla too.

And, sweet preschool friends. I mean, is there any cuter smile in the world than this one?!

But, my very favorite pictures were, again, ones I never knew were taken. Believe me, they are not my favorite because they are all of me. But, because they show the crazy similarities between me and my Katers. She looks the most like me of all three girls, and I knew that. But, to see us side by side...

doing the SAME thing with our hands...

And making the same expressions...

And just enjoying being together {with the same noses}, while we look through her journal pages...

These are all absolutely priceless to me!!

Apparently, Mark was in the mood to capture our moments, and I'm SO GLAD he did!

This is another few minutes in time that would have passed and I would not have known it was significant in any way.

But, it's these moments...right in the middle of every day life...that matter most. {By the way, I just re-read my last post as I was finishing this one. What is UP with me saying this again and again? I think the busyness of life is making this DEEP desire to "be still and know" come out more and more. That, and friends who have walked through deep loss lately, that brings me to my knees in sorrow...and gratitude...all at the same time. This is all reason for the repeated sappiness.}

ANYWAY. I am so glad my family thinks to capture pictures like these for me, and then leave them to be my surprise, right when I really needed it.

The Month in Pictures

2011-11-23T00:01:00.013-06:00

As Thanksgiving approaches, I realize another month has passed by.

Lately I've been having these moments where I really, REALLY want to freeze time and remember little things said and done. I need to find a notebook where I just write them down, because so many have passed by without finding their way to paper or blog or memory.

Just today, I had three or four of those moments where I just needed a snapshot of time, so I would never forget both the good and the bad and the funny and the sad.

...Like the middle of lunchtime, when I was desperately trying to finish our reading for the school day, and I lost all three of their attention as they somehow found their way to the living room to dance the Nutcracker together. I was so mad. And, then I was so glad. We never did finish the reading. But, someday, the mouse dance is what they'll remember.

...Or, tonight when they had a "sister prayer" at bedtime, where mom and dad were not invited. Don't you worry. Mark listened at the door. :) Sweetness. And, relationships being formed that will sustain them through ANYTHING in life.

...My favorite of the day: Abby Kate's victory dance {and ridiculous scream} when she beat Daddy in kindergarten yahtzee, and then made him write "LOSER" on his side of the score card. Oh, yeah, and she wrote WINNER on hers too.

...Carlie lingering in her bed this morning to read more of her book, which she says is "so awesome she can't stop". Be still my heart.

...And, the breathtaking one of the day: A moment when Kendyll looked up from her school work to ask me a question and I seriously saw her face as it will look at age 17, asking me a question about something much deeper than math. I had to take a deep breath. It was her hair. Or her eyes. Or just her older face. I don't know.

Why do days fly by so quickly that we don't always stop to treasure these moments?

I've had some in-my-face reminders lately that time is fleeting, and life is about so much more than what we spin our wheels doing.

Anyway, just feeling a bit pensive tonight. :)

Here are some moments from November(ish) that never got blogged, but are not to be forgotten:

School "on the hill"...

...Where the nature poem assignment was cut short by a nest they just HAD to make instead. :)

What makes me sad is that I was quite annoyed by all the "trouble" of dress-up clothes, and suitcases, and nest-building. I mean, "can't you just write a poem without all the props?"

Until I caught a glimpse of this face. Seriously. Build all the nests you want. (And, by the way, she has half the refrigerator packed under that pink blanket...)

Okay, this next one wasn't technically November. But, it's my hubby and my oldest on their way to a date together. And, I never blogged it. She felt so grown up. And, she had such a fun time with just Daddy. Kinda glad AK was too sick for me to go along. These are the things she'll remember...

And, this girl. My goodness. She is a busy one. Still enjoying school...both at home.

And at Sunshine School. (She got to make her own Hush and Brush book characters out of pumpkins. She was GIDDY.)

And, feeling very big these days in her piano lessons.

Ms. Roberta asked to "practice" on her for pre-K lessons, and we've been going strong ever since. She really loves piano. I think it MIGHT be because she gets to be like her big sisters. And, she gets to play Jingle Bells. Twenty times a day. :)

And, November means Popsy's birthday! Our traditional picture continues for the TENTH year!

As Christmas season approaches (but not yet!!), we had a very fun mommy/daughter sewing sleepover!

The mommies taught the girls how to sew, and some fun projects were made.

Some are secrets (shhh!) and the others were modeled right away. PJ pants for the girls!

They made them all by themselves! It was such a fun time with girls and moms who we adore.

So, that's {most of} the month in pictures. There is alot more to share about His Chase and funds being raised for new projects.

And, the fun we had with our visitor from Rwanda, who got to experience tex-mex, a pumpkin patch, and a six lane Dallas freeway all for the first time with us.

Then, there's the three men and a little lady who rode 20 miles to make a difference in the lives of orphans this month! And, there's still money coming in for their hard work! To God be the glory for hearts like these!!

But, that's all for another day. I promise. :)

Ola! Ni Hao! Aloha!

2011-11-13T23:40:00.007-06:00

So, to get me out of the blog funk I am in, I'm going with a no-brainer post. :) I have a much deeper, needs-to-get-out-of-my-head-and-onto-paper kind of post coming...

But, for now,

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!

This year's costumes were agreed on by the girls very early. They have known their "theme" since August, and while the details have wavered weekly, they stuck to their plan rather well.

Our entire curriculum for school is a trip around the world, studying different countries and cultures. So, they decided (at Kendyll's suggestion) to be from different countries!

After deciding between being French or Spanish or Mexican, Kendyll finally landed on a Spanish Senorita (a.k.a. Flamenco Dancer) and it could not have been more perfect for her personality.

She played up the sassiness and enjoyed doing the dances as much as possible. :)

Carlie decided very early that she would be Chinese. And, it was perfect for her too!

She loved her pink parasol and played the shy, reserved, beautiful Asian princess very well too.

My favorite part was seeing Carlie with black hair!

She was beautiful, actually! And, she loved having dark hair for a day. It was her dream come true.

And, then, we had our precious little Katers. She knew RIGHT away that she would be from Hawaii. (Did I mention on the blog that she went to Hawaii by herself with Pops and Grandma while we were in Rwanda this summer?) So, now she thinks she has a pretty special bond with the beautiful tropical islands and liked showing her moves too.

Here she is shaking those tiny, almost non-existent hips. Oh my, I love her.

It really was funny how well each country fit these three girls.

They all enjoyed their choices SO much! And, now we have great dress-up options for playtime!

We got to take the girls to the symphony the day before Halloween, and it was a "Monsters of Film" theme. We actually got to sit where the choir usually sits, so we could see the instruments up close and personal! And, the entire symphony was dressed up in their own costumes too.

It took Mark and I back a few years, as we heard Ghostbusters and a few other old school tunes. It was so much fun, and the girls loved trying out their costumes before the actual day arrived (minus the spraypaint hair and makeup).

And, it just so happened that we were already heading over to Pops and Grandma's house, so they got to see their little international granddaughters for a sneak peek!

On Halloween day, we helped with Abby Kate's school party (which I have not one picture of), where we made fall frames, played Halloween games, and had a blessing snack mix activity. Kendyll got to read the class their story, and I was reminded again how much I love that my big girls are with me for events like that. They LOVE getting to be a part of it all.

That evening, we spent time at Grandad and Grankay's house, eating hot dogs and trick-or-treating as a HUGE group of cousins. Wow. This group is a house full of fun!!

It was a fun day for everyone, and it ended in the perfect way , of course...

With plenty of chocolate for all the international travelers!

Now, our passports can go back in the drawer until next year. :)

Thoughtful Gifts...

2011-10-04T23:05:00.007-05:00

Just today, I took a walk through time, back to those first few weeks of loss again in my mind and heart, as I spent time sharing with a friend who is walking the same devastating road this week. This is not supposed to be the way it happens. And, as I shared with her friend some things that helped me, gifts that blessed me, and scriptures that changed me, I was once again thankful that God knows me and knows exactly what I need.

Even more than that, He knows what my family needs, even when I don't. And, He provides. ALWAYS.

That is the encouragement I was able to offer today. The God who created this whole big world also created YOU. He knows what you need. He knows how to show Himself most clearly to you. And HE WILL. He promises to do so.

What I guess I didn't think about is that God still does that two years after a loss.

I didn't know that we needed a gift like we received last week as much as we did. And, I especially didn't realize how MUCH it would mean to my three girls.

A sweet friend who lost her baby as well has begun working with Molly Bears, this amazing organization that sends weighted teddy bears to families. These teddy bears are beautiful and they weigh exactly what your little one weighed at birth, so you can always feel the weight of them in your arms.

I had no idea I needed that. But, I have LOVED holding my brand new 6 pound, 1 ounce Chase Bear, given to me by Tamberly last week. I can't even believe Chase felt that heavy! But, as I cradled the bear and laid it on my chest, it all came back. :)

But, an even GREATER blessing of this bear is watching the girls open their surprise.

There was LOTS of hugging and cuddling with their new little friend...

I told them as they opened it, that the one thing I will always be sad about, and the one thing I wish I could change more than anything was the fact that they never got to hold their brother. But, now, because of the blessing of a sweet friend, they would get to know what it would have felt like to have him in their arms.

Oh my, I can't even tell you what these moments were like for them. They literally fought over Chase Bear for 24 hours straight (we ended up having to set a timer!), and they never let him out of their sight. It was SO cute.

They each had the same reaction I did when they held him. Here Abby Kate says "He's so heavy!!!" I love that look!

Tamberly, I don't know how to say thank you for knowing just what we needed on this special day.

The Chase Bear is so perfect and already so, so , SO loved. :)

Another gift came too. A friend of Kendyll's who has moved away sent a letter and $87 in cash, that she wanted to give in memory of Chase for helping kids. She had earned the money by baking cakes and wanted to send it all to us. This, too, blew us away and was such a wonderful way to end our day, knowing that others were loving us in this way...and ultimately, loving on the children in need, which is even better!

We are so blessed. Sometimes I feel like I don't say it strong enough, because there aren't words. But, we appreciate you all. I love watching my kids learn firsthand what it means to be a family of Christ. It's the most amazing thing in this world.

Happy, happy Chase Day to you all. And, to my children, both in heaven and on earth. :)

Family Celebrations!

2011-10-04T21:27:00.009-05:00

So, let's start with this. My husband knows me really well. I know that sounds like an obvious thing. But, sometimes I am just really thankful for that gift about marriage. We work together well. :)

He knows me, and knows that when Chase Day is two days away, I'm going to panic. I'm going to come downstairs in the middle of a school day and worry to him about what we planned for Chase Day. Is it enough? Should I do something more? Have we included the girls enough? Should we have gifts for the family again this year? (I really did ask that. Crazy. I totally know that now.)

And, then, he knows just to hug me and tell me he loves me, and gently remind me that this day doesn't have to be overly scheduled and completely full of projects. It can be an easy day with our girls, being thankful for our blessings, and sharing them with others here and there.

And, then, he knew I would breathe deeper and say "You're right." and go back upstairs to teach science or something fun like that.

So, that's exactly what happened. Pretty much. (Name that kid show.)

And, I'm so glad he is who he is. The day was perfectly balanced with "acts of service and encouragement" and time together to relax. Believe me, I had a LONG list of ideas. But, I'm glad we only did half of them. :)

Our day started at the homeless shelter (as I posted about already), and was followed by a trip to Farmers Market, which might be our girls' favorite place in Dallas.

We let them pick out their flowers for Chase's Corner in our yard, and we got home to get our planting fun rolling.

Notice in this picture how HARD everyone is working, right?

Wait. Scroll back up and notice the girl standing on the bench.

See her? Well, she was good at helping everyone space the plants correctly, and wisely chose the perfect spot to move the birdfeeder to. She advised her daddy on how he could NOT trim the pecan tree because it wasn't fair to the branches. And, then she spent a lot of time making apple-sicles and pink lemonade pops for the family to enjoy after planting. But, digging and cleaning out beds and planting? Not so much.

Oh my, I love that girl. She makes a MEAN apple juice popsicle, even while her sisters are working up a sweat. :)

So, here is our finished Chase's Corner!

Boy did it need a makeover after this crazy summer heat! Now we've just got to keep it going.

We laughed and said it's a good thing Chase really lives in paradise, where there are no scorching summers or forgetful family members to water the garden there!

We had a great time planting and getting ready for fall. Then, headed out to get some goodies to send to our Compassion kids, and do a couple of "random drive-thru blessings", which the girls LOVE to do. We were also given a couple of other opportunities to bless people we came in contact with, which is just such a great reminder that this is how life should be lived EVERY day! Always looking around for the opportunity to surprise someone with love. It brought us so much joy!!

The evening of Chase Day was spent as a family of five, watching videos and looking at pictures of this last year...all that has come into our lives because of our little boy. We also spent time reading through cards and opening gifts that came to our family for Chase's 2nd birthday. (More on that in my next post!)

The next day, we had the extended family over for a balloon release and some dinner. And, mostly alot of cousin lovin' fun. :)

Watching them gather with their balloons made me smile.

And, the countdown started from 10!

And, as they released the balloons, they all yelled "HI CHASE!" and "WE LOVE YOU CHASE!!" at the top of their lungs.

See these little cupped hands? They were shouting loud enough for Chase to really hear them!

We watched the balloons float up, up, up...

Until we all watched a huge hawk begin circling the balloons! He was flying all among them and just circling and circling. I think he was VERY confused. (He's the brown spot in left center.)

But, the kids loved watching what was happening way up there.

Mark also made a GREAT 15 minute slideshow of this year to show that night, which was his first big project like this! It was amazing to see pictures and videos from the four trips to Africa since last Chase Day. It was a perfect way to end the weekend, thanking God for picture after picture of the Restoration He is bringing in our lives. What a happy CHASE Day it was. Good thing I listened to my better half. :)

CHASE Day at Sunshine School

2011-10-02T23:04:00.008-05:00

Whew! What a weekend we had!!

It was such a wonderful blend of celebrating our son, blessing others (and receiving blessings from that too!), and just enjoying being a family.

So many of you joined us in honoring others, and we truly appreciate that. We have LOVED hearing your stories. It means more than we could ever express.

We began our CHASE Day events on Thursday, as we celebrated with Sunshine School a day early. Since Kendyll is a creature of habit to the highest extent, she decided that we would bring donuts and coffee for the teachers EXACTLY like we did last year. So, that's the way we started. :) And, Kendyll and Carlie were great hostesses of that little party.

From there, WE were blessed by the entire Sunshine School bringing breakfast cereal for the homeless shelter in Dallas that many of our friends work with every week.

The piles were overflowing during morning carpool and we were so excited to watch it multiply!

During the day, I got sweet texts from teachers there, showing me pictures of the children celebrating Chase Day in chapel. Even to see his name on everything just makes me SO proud.

And, it's always the most precious thing to me to see children giving, and grasping (oftentimes easier than adults do!) what it means to be Jesus to others. It melts my heart.

One of the biggest blessings of CHASE Day was getting to be a part of delivering the cereal the next morning.

The people at the shelter are amazing and sweet and grateful and loving. And, we were blown away by what they did to honor Chase.

They had set up a whole table full of stuffed animals, with candles in the middle to remember our baby boy. (You can kind of see it in this picture...)

They also wanted each of the children there to pick an animal to take, and---this is the kicker----they officially made September 30th a permanently commemorated day--"Chase Day"--on their calendar! It blew me away. And, truly, we were MUCH more blessed than they were by our time there.

And, if I even tried to sum up what these four ladies (and so many others at Sunshine School) mean to me, I couldn't do it. They were the minds behind all of this, and have blessed my life in so many ways. It is an honor to call them friend, and to be able to serve alongside them.

Thank you, Amy, Marla, Krista, Jolie, and Rebekah...along with all the other teachers and students and parents of Sunshine School for being a significant part of our CHASE Day blessings this year.

And, as if that wasn't enough, we got more surprises when we picked Abby Kate up from school! Mrs. Marla, her amazing teacher, made a frame with a sweet poem and all her classmates' thumbprint art of angels holding balloons.

The poem, in case you can't see it well on these pictures, says this:

Escape

How happy are balloons

That finally get away?

Escaped from little hands

That tried to make them stay

Where do they go, I wonder?

With no map to guide them

To Heaven I would guess

Where little angels ride them!

How perfect is that? (And would you believe it was written by Jeff Foxworthy? So funny!)

So, Mrs. Marla's class gave this sweet gift to Abby Kate, along with a bouquet of balloons. From the minute we got in the car, she made sure everyone knew that these were her special gifts from her friends in class.

This was a really important thing for her. She got her own celebration for Chase, and I loved watching her plan out how she wanted to send him the balloons.

She wrote on each one, and asked if she could "talk to him" before she sent them.

Sometimes I can't handle her PRECIOUSNESS! She told him that she loved him and to have fun with the balloons and that he is her brother forever. :)

This sweet girl---and her love for her brother...

There have been many moments lately where I am blown away by what she understands about her little Chase. She was really so small when he died. But, she probably talks about him more than anyone. :) Here are a couple of stories I don't want to forget.

The other day, she asked if she could just look at his picture for a while "so she could remember him better". So she took a frame we have of me holding Chase, and a singing card we received (Sarah, all three girls LOVE the Beauty Will Rise card you sent!!) and played the song that means so much to us, while staring at his picture. I couldn't even breathe, it was so sweet.

Then, on CHASE Day, we were eating as a family, and a dad was there with his one year old son, sitting next to us. On our way out, we talked to the little boy and told the father how CUTE his son was. Abby Kate, after hearing that he had just turned one, said "He's just a little bit smaller than our baby brother. He is two today." My heart stopped, because this dad looked confused about why we were all there without our two year old son, on his birthday especially! But, we all just smiled and patted Abby Kate lovingly on the head, and walked out.

I love that she wants to tell the world about him. I love that she wants to stare at his little face. I love that having a brother in heaven doesn't make her sad. It makes her happy. :) I love that she sends balloons and love to him. And, I love that she goes to a school where she AND her baby brother are celebrated and loved too. :)

Thank you Sunshine School for all you have done to make CHASE Day so special for us. We appreciate you all so much!!

C.H.A.S.E. Day is FRIDAY!

2011-09-28T22:19:00.004-05:00

We've officially entered a time of year that will always be significant for us. The last week in September...when seasons are changing, the State Fair is in town, and pumpkins begin to grace the front porches of friends and neighbors. It all brings back so much in my heart.

Sure, some of it is hard. We said goodbye to our child long before we wanted to, and that will always hurt. I remember conversations, smells, meals, emotions, scriptures, acts of service...details of every kind from two years ago. (It's really amazing how vivid those things are.)

But, as we enter this week of remembering, I also remember amazing moments of clarity and vision for what this life is all about.

So, for that reason, we are also entering a time of thanksgiving.

Because our little Chase taught us to love without hesitation...and saying goodbye to him has made us live differently.

This is the thing: We aren't guaranteed tomorrow. Now, aren't you glad you stopped by my blog for some upbeat encouragement tonight? Let me say it a more positive way:

We have TODAY to make a difference. We have TODAY to hug our kids and share with them the riches of living in God's love. We have TODAY to bless someone else in need, or express appreciation to someone who deserves our gratitude. We have TODAY to reconcile with someone we miss in our life.

And, that's what I've learned. TODAY matters. It was created for us to spend sharing His glory. And, to bless someone else with our gifts, talents, love, and resources.

So, because we have been given another opportunity this year to celebrate our son---to celebrate all he has brought to our lives---and to celebrate what we have learned from walking this road, we are

Choosing to

Honor thru

Acts of

Service and

Encouragement

To bless without holding back. To stop and realize that every day we've been given is God's day to use as He would like.

C.H.A.S.E. Day is FRIDAY!

And, just like last year, we'd love for you to join us. Bless someone else unexpectedly. And, in doing this, help us honor a precious little boy who reminded us that "this world is not our home". But, until we're home with him, we're gonna love like crazy. Because it's an honor to do so.

In just a few hours, our family will start our C.H.A.S.E. Day fun a little early, and just like last year, these girls are SO excited to get going! So, join in the fun!! And, thank you for your love, as always.

A Little of This, A Little of That

2011-09-21T22:17:00.017-05:00

It might be one of those posts. It's late at night. I'm counting my blessings. And, I'm finding pictures I forgot to blog... :)

If it's any excuse, I seem to be neck-deep in schooling around here. So much so that I kind of feel like nothing much else is getting accomplished.

But, hey, we're still able to say--at the end of the day---that we read

and learn

and explore

and make patterns

and play with colored sand.

You know, all in a day's work, right?

OH! And, we bake cakes! Umm, no. WE don't bake cakes.

Grandma bakes amazing cakes and then lets us help her decorate them!

One of the suggestions in our geography curriculum is to make a world cake, where the kids practice their continent knowledge and you have fun baking together. When I read this, I knew I had two options: 1) Skip it entirely and ignore the idea or

2) ask Grandma to be in charge with all of her cake-decorating training and skill!

I mean, look at these supplies! She knows what she's doing!

Luckily, she said yes. And, last Friday, we spent the whole day preparing this cake in every way. Okay, not really. Grandma had done quite a bit of prep work ahead of time. Like the whole "baking the cakes" part. :)

So, we spent our time rolling fondant,

cutting out shapes and letters,

and decorating all three tiers!

It took a few hours,{and we may have had a few issues, like the globe layer imploding on us}

but it was so worth the effort!

The girls had so much fun making it, and we ALL enjoyed eating it too!!

I love that Cheri took a picture of me with the girls, as if I had anything to do with this project. I cut out one word and a few little hearts and flowers. That was it! But, boy was I proud of these girls' masterpiece!

Oh, man. It's good to look at these pictures on the iPhone tonight.

Because, I won't lie. This week started R-O-U-G-H on the homeschool front. I mean, days were ending at 7:00 pm. Tempers were flaring and patience was lacking.

And, I mean from the teacher.

But, after some time literally on my face in prayer this morning (and I don't say that from deep spirituality...it was more of a moment of absolute desperation in needing a new attitude),

I gave a few things back to God...again...and today went much better.

(By the way, you know how God will send you a message a few different ways to make sure you KNOW what He's trying to tell you? Well, this was my message, given three times in the last 2 days: Repentance does not mean saying you're sorry.

It means turning and walking in a new direction.

I won't get into what that means for me right now. But, let's just say I've said sorry for some things repeatedly lately, without changing the way I was walking. I needed the message.)

God is working on me big time. He is making sure I realize that there is JOY to be found in serving and loving and treasuring the children I have under my roof. There is even JOY in the waiting and the missing of the ones who aren't. There is MOVEMENT even when I doubt it.

And, there is VALUE in being pruned for His glory. Whew.

Meanwhile, even with all of that going on, I am being filled. Thank you Lord. And, I'm counting it all joy {even if the teeth are clinched at times} to be mom to these cuties.

Let's see...what else should I cover in this tangent blog?

Oh, yes! This littlest cutie started preschool last week with her sweet teacher, Mrs. Marla!

Abby Kate has been so excited about being in the big 4-year-old class and has talked NON-STOP every single day of school about all they are learning and doing and saying and playing. She has alot to say. And, I just wish I could record it all.

She wanted pictures with each of us on her first day of school and was quite proud to be the one everyone was doting over.

Boy, is she the baby or what?!

As I looked through pics of August, I came across a few more that never made it to the blog.

First, these precious pics of the girls with our Annie Girl on our last night with her.

Three days after we got home from Rwanda, we found out Annie had aggressive bone cancer and was in extreme pain. Her cancer had most likely spread to her brain, judging from her inability to walk. This all happened SO FAST while we were gone to Africa. And, it broke our hearts to have to say goodbye to our sweet dog, who had literally walked through every single part of our married life.

She has welcomed each of the girls home, never leaving their sides as newborns. She even took extra care of me when I couldn't bring my Chase home. She knew something was wrong and stayed in whatever room I was in for days and days. She protected me anytime Mark was gone. She enjoyed barking at the mailman and the trash man and the pizza man.

She made us laugh with her lazy habits and her long naps on her favorite stair. She loved and loved and loved our family. And, she is missed every single day.

The girls like to imagine that she is with Chase now,

loving on him and playing like she used to when she was young.

All I know is she is loved and missed.

Especially by this girl.

Carlie had a very special bond with Annie, and is certainly the animal lover of the family.

I was really worried about her saying goodbye...and it was hard.

But, the next day, we celebrated her SEVENTH birthday with a trip to Build A Bear,

where she made her own Annie Girl dog, who sleeps with her every night now.

So, all is getting better. Well, not yet. When she gets another dog, she says she'll finally feel better. Oh, goodness.

And, yes, I know I haven't even blogged about Carlie turning seven. She did. While I was in Rwanda the second time. On August 12th. And, Grandma made another cute cake and she was celebrated by cousins of all kinds. :)

We sent her flowers and balloons, trying to make up for the fact that we were gone on her birthday. :( We still have celebrating left to do for that girl.

And, she has been oh-so-patient to wait for it.

And, last but not least...there's another birthday quickly approaching! Sweet little Chase has been in heaven for two years next Friday, September 30th. I was just telling my sister tonight that it is still amazing to me that not a day goes by that he is not mentioned in our house. He is celebrated always. Even today, Kendyll was talking again about which sister he looked most like, and what he's probably doing in heaven today.

He's a part of us. Always. This time of year will always be about him for me. So much reminds me of him...of both the mourning and the comfort. And, we look forward to marking next Friday as another year closer to loving on him someday.

Sweet baby boy!! We can't wait to spend a whole day celebrating.

C.H.A.S.E. day is coming. We will honor you by blessing others again this year,

and we always will spend your day this way...

because you have blessed us and changed us forever.

(This is last year's picture, but it is soon to be updated...stay tuned.)

School's in Session!

2011-09-06T21:33:00.013-05:00

Well, there's nothing like ignoring your responsibilities by blogging about them instead!

I should be in the school room getting ready for our day tomorrow. But, I told myself that I would just sit down for a few minutes and answer emails. But, that was two hours ago. And, my inbox looked too daunting (sorry, friends, who are waiting for my response!) so I looked at a couple of homeschooling blogs. Which then inspired me to actually do my "first day of school" blog before the first week has passed.

So, instead of organizing for tomorrow (or emailing), I am blogging!

But, the good thing is, we are having homeschool outdoors tomorrow for a nature day. So, there's time for packing up the books later. It's one of the things I love most about this whole thing. :)

We began school last week on September 1st. This is funny for a couple of reasons. First, if you had told me two weeks ago (while I was still in Rwanda) that my school plans needed to be done by September 1st, I would have laughed...or cried.

It seemed unattainable then, seeing that everything was still packed in the box it was shipped in.

I had kind of thought we would start later this year, considering the circumstances.

But, these three girls are creatures of habit. (Don't know where they get that from.) And, they wanted to start on September 1st, just like we did last year.

So, it was set. We were starting whether I was ready or not! And, on top of that, Abby Kate wanted to be a full-time member of homeschool this year. So, I was planning for three instead of two, and trying to accommodate some of our curriculum for a pre-K student, while making some new lessons for her age as well! (She is so cute, by the way, with her own notebooks and journal. She really is way too big, and is such a good little student.)

In order for me to get something ready by September, the girls got to go shopping with Grandma for back to school clothes (thank you, Cheri!) and then, my amazing husband took the kids out all over town for a couple of days in a row so I could plan like a mad woman...and with that time, I managed to get the first 9 weeks done.

They also got to go on a fun scavenger hunt for their supplies with Dad. They had a few seconds to look at all the pictures I texted them...some were for serious supplies.

And, some were more fun!

(You gotta have PE options, you know.) Then, they had to find everything on their list.

They loved it, of course. And, Abby Kate especially loved the bouncy balls.

While they shopped and played and went to movies, I planned, and cut, and laminated, and planned some more.

My school room looked like this during that weekend:

And, I think I ate one meal a day. It was a "working weekend" for sure. :)

But, oh so worth it. I managed to organize a few new spaces, update our old spaces, get 12 notebooks emptied and reloaded, and bring in the new books and curriculum, ready for a new year.

I was getting so excited as I read through the material and planned our lessons. It is going to be a GREAT year with My Father's World. We are doing Exploring Countries and Cultures as our main curriculum for history/geography/science/Bible and it has already impressed us. We will be exploring various countries around the world, learning all about their culture and people (geography & history), as well as the biomes and ecozones of their land (science). But, what I really love are the Bible lessons that we will go through. We are studying Matthew all year, but we are also praying for each nation as we learn about native beliefs of various cultures, as well as missionaries who live and work in different places. We are truly seeing what it means to "go into all the world" and share the love of Jesus. I LOVE it. (And, I love that it's already written for me too!)

Today, we learned about how many languages in the world still don't have a Bible in their native tongue and how it changes their lives to receive a Bible and learn that there is One True God who loves them and wants to give them hope and a future. We also talked about how hard people work to translate Bibles. This was seriously something my kids had never even thought about. The idea that people would not have Bibles was just something totally new to them. There were some precious discussions around this, and I was thankful yet again that I get to spend my days doing this. It's so worth it.

My other favorite thing this year is Kendyll's business math, where she gets to run her own pet store, complete with ordering inventory, keeping account of her sales, paying bills, and creating her own name and logo. She even wrote a jingle for her store on the piano! I am so thankful for the "Critter Corner" pet store. We have had a whole different start to math this year because of it.

There is alot more I could say about curriculum. Language arts... spelling... French... typing... second grade readers. Lots of fun things that make my nerdiness come out like crazy. We are all excited about our lessons this year. But, I'll stop there for now, since I'm now totally on a tangent.

The first day of school was a fun one, although always a tiny bit crazy when you're the teacher. We left it pretty light on the academics, and I was so surprised to hear they expected to do more work! Never can tell which way it will go?

The night before homeschool was a school celebration of Mexican food and frozen yogurt...

and I layed out the surprises for the morning!

A craft project to make our journals and clipboards pretty...

And their new grades on signs for school pictures.

Of course, Carlie was not so impressed with her surprises, because they did not involve candy in any way. (Unfortunately for my children, we recently had to crack down on a few rules around here, and now most everything they used to think was their "right" has now been redefined as "privileges" they earn. Candy being one of those. And, "crack down on rules" is another way to say that all of a sudden some behaviors have been out.of.control around here and Mom and Dad were about to go CrAZy. Major boot camp has come to town in the Jacobs home.)

But, anyway, back to the first day.

We had our "to-go" breakfast of donuts and Starbucks. Funny, really, how backwards that tradition seems. I guess we should be having a homecooked breakfast on the first day. But, a drive thru to Starbucks and a stop at our neighborhood donut shop was a dream breakfast for all of us, so we went with it. :)

After breakfast, we did our school pictures. And, oh my goodness, how did my girls get THIS BIG???

Takes my breath away to see this girl. FOURTH grade?? Somebody stop her.

And, Carlie is my big second grade girl this year!

And, she is quite the studious girl. The first day, she asked me why she couldn't have a spelling list that day, and why we were "just talking about math but not doing any??" She got her wish the next day. I sure hope she keeps that eager spirit all year!

And, my, oh my. Katers is such a cutie this year.

She is VERY very proud to be a homeschooler. Officially. She says it multiple times every day, usually while hugging my leg. "I can't believe it that I'm in homeschool now!" That's what she's saying in this picture, actually. "I'm in homeschoool, I'm in homeschoool!"

Again, I hope that sticks.

For now, she has been quite a good little student, and does not quit until she has all of her items erased from her dry-erase-to-do list each day.

So, we finished the first school day talking about our geography curriculum, and beginning our "Children of the World" poster. We will add a new child to this poster for each country we study, and eventually their hands will connect all the way around the globe.

I can't think of a better thing to be studying for this little family. We're looking forward to a year full of fun.

(And, hopefully lots of learning too.)

We are so thankful for some cooler Texas weather too, which makes school at home so much better. PE time can be outdoors (we're working on volleyball skills right now!), school time can be outdoors, and--most importantly--play time can be outdoors!

Since we did NOT have cool weather the first two days of school, I made up a chore for them to do outside. They washed the cars and got all soapy and wet. It was great! They laughed and screamed and sprayed each other. All with the doors to the house closed. So I could pretend they were quiet for an hour. :)

All the fun that comes in a school day around here.

Meanwhile, this Mommy has now spent quite a bit of work time just talking about working. Oh well. That might be what tomorrow morning will be for!

Happy Birthday, Vestine!

2011-09-05T09:49:00.012-05:00

Today has been a very special day across the world in Rwanda, even though she'll be sleeping soon by now.

This little one,

who has found a place deep in our hearts,

turns ONE today!!!

Now, just to clarify before I begin to gush about this little girl, everything in us wishes she was the one we could bring home to our family, after months of loving her. But right now, this is just not an option. We are praying for changes, so that MANY children like Vestine can be given forever families. But, for now, we love her and pray for her from afar, knowing that God's perfect plan for her life will prevail, even if it doesn't look the way we would like. :)

But, for today...I sure wish we were there to love on her and sing to her and tell her how special she is.

I wish she could know how we pray for her every single day. I wish she knew how much I loved holding her while she slept.

But, someday we'll tell her...that we DID sing and we DID love and we DID think of how special she was all. day. long on September 5th...half a world away.

It's one of the hardest things about loving all the kids we love, in both Ghana and Rwanda.

God puts such special children on our hearts who we have to love from so far away. Part of our hearts live in other countries, and I'm still getting used to that. Or, will I ever really?

And, also.

This mommy can hardly stand it that so many orphans do not know the day they were born. They do not have a special day to celebrate their life. I think about my girls' birthdays and how MUCH they are celebrated from the moment they wake up. And, it makes me want to just plan birthday parties every single day the next time I'm with orphans.

Really. I'm going to. Who's with me?

This morning, as I woke up praying for sweet Vestine to KNOW she is loved and special today, I was reminded again that God doesn't need a special day of the year to show His love and sing His songs over His children. He celebrates them every day.

I don't think it's any coincidence at all, that after saying this prayer, the first song my Ipod Shuffle list played this morning was You Are Being Loved, by Steven Curtis Chapman.

"You are being loved. Right now at this very moment, you are being loved. There's a song being sung over you, by the One who breathed life into you!

"With every breath that you're taking, and every beat of your heart...whatever you do, wherever you are, there's a Song being sung over you."

God, thank you for singing over these sweet children even when many of us who love them can't.

We love you, precious girl! Happy First Birthday. We celebrate you today and all that you brought to our hearts and our family.

A Divine Calling for Cailee D

2011-09-02T19:50:00.007-05:00

When we first began planning for our summer trip to Rwanda, Mark and I were {hoping} that it would be a rather long visit for our family. And, since it would {hopefully} even be a few weeks away, we planned to take all three girls, as well as my amazing sister, Cailee, to help us take care of them. But, for a few different reasons, we decided to change our original idea, and travel with our Noel team for two weeks instead.

So, as that plan changed, we also decided that Abby Kate could stay home with Grandma and Gammy for her own fun, and that the big girls would not need as much "babysitting" as we first thought.

But, what I think is interesting is that the main reason we first needed Cailee along for the Rwanda ride was to help us with the kids for the multiple weeks we would spend there. And, even as our plans changed, our desire to have Cailee with us didn't.

Basically, God had an entirely different agenda for my baby sister that I believe was there from the very beginning. (Although she STILL did plenty of loving on my kids, and helped with them a TON too!)

We, of course, knew that her heart had been in Africa for a long time, and that she was already searching and praying for a way to go and serve there. But, HIS timing was perfect because He knew the time was NOW and the place was Noel.

What began as a nanny job, ended up being a personal calling from the Lord on Cailee's life. And, I had to devote a whole post to what it was like to watch God's calling form, and then play out while we were in Rwanda.

A week before we left, the elders at our church had an amazing time of prayer over us and our team. There were powerful prayers and incredibly encouraging conversations in that room.

But, one that will always stand out to me was after the prayer time was over, as Cailee and I talked with the women's minister, Janice. She confirmed what we already knew, as she looked right in Cailee's eyes and told her that she sensed strongly that God has REALLY big plans for her in Rwanda. We all talked about how God brought her to this opportunity and how significant we can all tell it will be for her specifically.

It may not sound as powerful as it was. And, I can't explain why it was. It was just something we all sensed was happening.

And, even though I can't share it as well as Cailee can, my sister had also been having some amazing time with the Lord, where scriptures were coming alive for her about being the hands and feet of Jesus to the poor and orphaned.

I will never forget as she sat on my couch and shared what God was doing in her heart: "The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me, because the Lord has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor..."

Oh how true this was!

I am SO so SO so glad I got to experience Rwanda with my sister.

Whether she was playing babies, having her hair braided, or taking long walks with some of the kids, she was completely focused on whatever child was holding her hand or sitting in her lap for that moment.

(And, she even danced her way into the heart of some! Look at those moves!!)

She was an amazing part of the team, and blessed so many others in our group.

I especially loved watching these three become the best of friends, inseparable as they loved on these kids!

And, of course, getting to share in these kind of sister moments was the BEST...we found lots of time to love on our little Vestine together. :)

There were also times, though, when we didn't see each other all day, because we had gone our own way loving on the children He had planned for us that day.

But, even then, I loved watching her from afar. She had such an easy way of just BEING with these kids. As my mom said on a text, she just has so much love to give. And, it's true.

Since she was little, she has had such a compassionate spirit, to the point where we would laugh at her feeling sorry for stuffed animals who felt left out on her shelf if she didn't play with them equally. She didn't want anyone to hurt or not feel loved.

And, WOW, how God has placed that in her for a bigger God-glorifying reason!!

I have no doubt that Cailee will live her life loving others in the way I watched her do in Rwanda.

I have no doubt that countless numbers of orphans at Noel love and adore her, but also feel loved and adored BY her, even now after we have left.

I have no doubt that what God intended for this trip to be in her life will continue to be revealed as time passes.

Because it was NOT a nanny trip.

It was a divine calling for THIS time and THIS place and THIS beautiful girl.

I love you, Cailee D. And, I am so incredibly proud to call you sister.

Blessing the Babies

2011-08-20T13:39:00.000-05:00

The baby room is a busy place at Noel.

So, I'm sure you could all guess where most of us spent hours every day. :)

Well, maybe not hours. But, we certainly all found our time to cuddle the precious babies at Noel.

There are so many of them, and there are so many needs in this room. But, there is also so much love to give and get back in this room too!

And, some of my favorite pics are when our team and these babies are face to face, talking and cooing at each other. These babies need this kind of contact so much, and I love seeing the expression in their eyes as they respond to the love.

It always amazes me how God just draws each person to a certain baby, who basically becomes their own by the end of the week.

I know that has happened for me on both trips to Noel, and now Vestine and Louisa are forever in my heart. They are prayed for daily. They are missed dearly. And, they are squeezed and loved and sung to every day while I'm at Noel!

And, this wasn't just me. Every single person on our trip became attached to a baby or two.

And, I can't help but think God does that for a reason...so that in a small "baby" way, they can attach to a smiling face, and feel loved, knowing somehow they are KNOWN individually.

We were also able, once again, to have a true impact on their lives, through generosity of all kinds.

Two sweet patients of the doctors on our trip crocheted baby hats, and the mamas LOVED putting the hats on all the babies!

There were many sweet babies modeling the onesies from The Hills VBS, along with some adorable bows that we passed out to the whole room!

And, many of you (especially kiddos from The Branch VBS!) raised funds for formula for the babies. We were so happy to go shopping for cans and cans of formula, with more coming EVERY month for these little ones!

So many helped to shop, load, unload, and pack away the formula, all with huge smiles on our faces, as we recognized what a wonderful thing this was for the little ones we all loved.

Sara, who was diligent in finding out which local formulas offered the most calories and nutrition was happy with the results!

And, so were the Noel staff!!

Then, one of my favorite baby projects was the new baby mobiles.

Just weeks before I left for Rwanda, I had the pleasure of speaking to my mom's Ladies Bible Class about the work we are doing in Africa.

I guarantee you I was more blessed than they were, because following my time of sharing, they fed me lunch AND worked hard on these baby mobiles that we were planning to bring to Noel.

My friend, Stephanie, was the creative mastermind behind these mobiles, and helped me to come up with a plan on how to make each one.Then, these sweet women cut and traced and ironed, getting them all ready for packing!

When we got to Noel, we realized some tweaking must be done for the mobiles to be hung like we had hoped. So, that is when "the boys" got to work designing a new system for hanging them.

After all the different people spent time designing and working and hanging, the end result was AWESOME!

I can't even TELL YOU how much I love these mobiles.

The color they add, the stimulation they bring, and the happiness they share...

Probably the only thing I love more than the mobiles, are the faces that lay below them.

They were all amazed and entranced by the flowing circles above them, and I couldn't hold back the tears as they kicked their legs, flapped their arms, and even cooed and talked as they saw them for the first time.

AMAZING TRANSFORMATION. And, all with some fabric circles and ribbon. And, lots and lots of laboring love. :)

Blessing the babies was so much fun. Those little faces and smiles are so addicting.

Many of us are in constant prayer for the future of these little lives, and we beg you to join us. At this point, they are so overwhelmed with the number of babies at Noel, they have had to turn little ones away for the first time. It breaks my heart. These little ones deserve so much more. They deserve to know the love of a family. They deserve to know they are special and created for big purposes in life. We're praying hard for all of that and so much more.

God, bless these babies in all the ways You know they need it most. Thank you for allowing our teams to be changed by their sweetness, and reminded of Your love for each one of them. You see them, and You know them. And, we trust You.

It's the Simple Things

2011-08-20T12:18:00.000-05:00

It's really strange to look back at my first visit to Noel, and see what "stuck out" to me then. In the midst of many needs, there were some simple things that seemed like a big deal to me.

This picture that I took in January:

And, the girl pictured in it...broke my heart.

She didn't want her picture taken. But, as I took pictures and showed her, she warmed up to the idea.

What I noticed besides her sweet timid smile, was the bed she was sleeping in.

She didn't have a pillow to lay her head on.

She didn't have a clean mattress to keep her healthy.

She didn't have a room to sleep in that made her happy.

What I didn't know then, was that our good friends at The Point Foundation had already made plans for some amazing improvements in the girls' bedrooms. And, I am so happy to say that they now have new bunks, and brightly colored painted walls, along with new sheets that our Visiting Orphans group brought back in January.

So, thanks to the generosity of so many, we were able to just add some simple things to their rooms that we pray make their life happy, healthy, and more comfortable.

First item on the list: PILLOWS.

I don't know why this was such an important thing to me. Maybe because I'm a pillow person. I sleep on two every night and they are just the perfect balance of softness to make me sleep comfortably. I can't imagine being 14 or 16 and not having a pillow at all.

So, we handed out pillows to all the oldest kids. And, oh the SMILES we got in return.

They were beside themselves with joy over the simplest of things.

It might be small and simple. But, it is a luxury in their life that they deserve.

It was so cute to walk into the very oldest boys' rooms and see them making their beds and showing off their pillows. One of the Rwandan friends who was walking with us told us these boys never make their beds, but now they are proud and want to make it look nice. So, so sweet.

In addition to the pillows, we also had all the older girls spend the day with us, making their own pillowcases.

Well, actually, we never meant for it to be the whole day. And, my American way of rushing to the next thing made me want to shut it down and move on after the first couple of hours. But, Tara so gently reminded me that they never get to do this. They never get an entire day to color and doodle and visit with their friends, all while creating a piece of art that will decorate their bed and show others what is important about them.

So, it was a full day of creating. And, I'm glad we got to be a part of it. :)

In addition to their pillows and pillowcases, we also wanted the girls to have a cute room they were proud of. So, we gave them some paper lanterns, sparkly flowers, and posters for them to use as they wished, along with some crafty items they can use later to add even more!

Once again, such smiles and laughter. It was priceless.

And, the last thing we did for the bedrooms, was actually something we added after being there for the first week. We quickly realized that every single bed in the whole orphanage could benefit from a plastic mattress cover.

So, thanks to some really good friends who ran all over Dallas shopping for these, we were able to cover every single bed in the orphanage the next week!!

This was a really big deal for the health of the children, and was just another way that YOU, our awesome donors, made a HUGE and significant impact on the lives of these kiddos.

...because it's the simplest of things that make the biggest statement to these children: they matter to so many people!

Play is their language...

2011-08-20T11:23:00.000-05:00

...and toys are their words.

That quote is from my days of grad school. And, it's one I've thought of often through the years of being a mommy, a teacher, and a caretaker of children in different ways.

It's true. The primary way that children communicate their thoughts, feelings, or fears, is through their play. They learn how things work, who they are, and what life is like, as they play. They learn how to interact with others, and get to dream about life beyond their playroom walls through their play.

So what happens when children don't have that outlet in their lives? They aren't stimulated, they don't grow and develop in the same way, and they don't have a voice for what they feel or think.

Now, America has this wrong in many ways too. We have, once again, gone to the extreme and given too much to our kids. Too many toys, that have too many buttons, and do too much of the "playing" for the kids. It takes away their voice and their development in much the same way, actually.

But, when you're taken back to the basics...and you watch a child play who has really never played before...it is powerful.

And, we saw this quote come to life in new ways while in Rwanda.

They got to explore, and create, and learn.

And, my favorite moments were when I could remember the donors sweet smiles as they gave, reflected on the faces of children at Noel, as they received.

So many friends and family, community groups and church Bible classes helped with the effort of bringing developmental toys to Noel, and we are so thankful!

Claire is one of those donors who I wished could have been there to see the smiles and the LIFE her toys brought.

Instead of asking for gifts or receving the trip her grandparents had already promised for her thirteenth birthday, she asked for developmental toys and supplies for the children of Noel.

Amy and I got to go shopping with her before we left for Rwanda, and it was SO FUN to see all the things she purchased being used to bless the lives of these kids.

And, these gifts will continue to change their lives, and improve their development forever!

Other items, like these exersaucers, given by another generous donor, are literally changing LIVES, making these sweet babies stronger, physically and emotionally, as they experience their world in whole new ways!

This little boy, Fabrice, had tuberculosis when we were here in January. You can see from the atrophy of his leg muscles that he is weaker than he should be for his age. It is our hope that daily exercise in these little Go-Pods will change his life for the better.

Meeting these developmental needs was one of our very favorite efforts to be a part of, as we watched it bring INSTANT change in the hearts and minds of these little ones.

You could just SEE their face light up as a new toy would challenge their minds and bodies to do things they don't usually get to do. And, over even a week's time, the caretakers were starting to see it too!

We've already had reports since we left that the caretakers are using the toys to facilitate more play time and interaction with the children, and we are just thrilled to hear this news! This is an important change in the lives of these kids, as they grow and develop, and it is vital to their health and happiness too!

Another wonderful opportunity we had was to bring MUSIC to Noel! Carol, who was an amazing part of our team for two weeks, led a sweet music class with the children, where they got to play instruments, follow rhythms, and join in singing.

It was so sweet to watch them respond, and to enjoy playing and learning at the same time!

These drums were one of our very favorite purchases from Lakeshore! They were definitely a "big hit" with the kids too! :)

So, as you can see, we are so very thankful for the way so many of you contributed to this trip. You are changing lives for the better, allowing these children to learn and grow in the way they do best: by PLAYING!! And this is only the beginning of the fun!

A BUS FULL o' FuN!

2011-08-20T10:09:00.002-05:00

Oh, if you could have seen this bus in person. The picture doesn't accurately show how WEIGHED DOWN this bus was full of supplies for Noel. It's a miracle that it made it all the way to Gisenyi, actually. I have no doubt the tires--and possibly the engine--had to be replaced after this road trip.

And, with this bus full o' fun, came alot of love and blessing from all of you. So, I'm officially starting a series of blogs on the projects we were blessed to complete while we were in Rwanda.

So many donations, so many fun ideas, so many blessings were given by our donors, and our friends, and our family. We hope you enjoy seeing the fruit of your giving!

As we unpacked all of these donations, it took quite a bit of organizing it all to get it ready to hand out.

Everyone chipped in to help, and we were VERY glad to have two of the bedrooms at Tara's awesome guest house to use for organizing.

And, of course, Amy B, who is our Organizer Extraordinaire, worked hard to get everything in its place.

As we looked over all of the things that so many had contributed to, we had one thought: HOW did we bring this much stuff?? And, HOW are we possibly going to distribute this out to all the children and staff in an orderly way?

I will say, it is hard to be fair, equal, and methodical with 600 children, especially when they are eager (desperate) for new things to call their own. There were times when just the distribution alone was exhausting. But, so so SO worth it.

Just wait and see. You have blessed these kids in mighty ways!

A Few Highlights from Rwanda

2011-08-13T09:40:00.030-05:00

I tried to come up with my "Top Ten Moments" on this trip, but there are really too many to even count! So, these are ten highlights from our trip that just came to me first...I'm sure there will be more to come.

1. Watching our medical team work!

As I mentioned before, we had friends from all areas of our life on this trip with us, sharing their amazing gifts and training with these kids.

It was so cool to watch all the different groups come together and make the most amazing team I've ever seen!

There were many moments where I got tears in my eyes watching sweet friends bring healing and hope to these children.

The medical team began each morning with "first things first", praying that God blesses the work of their hands and gives them sharp minds for the children they will treat. What a blessing to serve alongside people who are serving the Lord like this.

And, there were SO many moments where God whispered "This is why you're here...for this child right here!"

Words are failing me, as I try to describe my gratitude to this team and all who helped this effort. It was quite the undertaking to see 552 children in a week. But, they shined in amazing ways.

And, of course, while the doctors and nurses were doing things like this:

And, the amazing office staff was doing this:

The waiting room team {which I was a part of} was doing this:

And, this.

It was a rough gig. :)

But, even then, as we were seemingly "only" playing, I found some of my favorite, most powerful moments as well.

2) Teaching children how to play. It's sad, really, that any teaching was necessary but it was another way God used our team.

As these sweet ones fed their babies, or rocked them...

...they were learning to nurture and love.

Or, as they popped bubbles and drew pictures...

They were FREE to be kids! There was such JOY in that!

I have shared this story with our team already, but one of my favorite, but simple moments, was when the 5 year old boys came into the waiting room. None of these children have much to call their own, so their instinct is to hoard whatever they find. They began shoving wooden blocks into their shirts and just sat down with them. They had NO idea what to do with blocks!

So, I sat in the floor and showed them how to build a house or a tower.

It was a miracle moment for me...they began to build, and play together, sharing the blocks and connecting their little houses to each other's buildings or towers.

They just needed someone to show them how. And, we were all continually blessed throughout our time at Noel by opportunities like this one...whether it was running soccer drills or beading necklaces or playing musical instruments, they were given new opportunities to express themselves that every child deserves!

3. Seeing my Noel friends again! After our trip here in January, I was so anxious to see the sweet ones I connected to before. One of my first hugs off the bus was from Vedaste, my sweet 9 year old friend who never left my side last time. Of course, I had my favorites from the baby nursery and toddler rooms too, who are now growing up and getting so big!

I loved on my little Vestine every day, and loved seeing how all the babies have grown.

But, one of my favorite reunion moments came the third day we were there. My friend, John, came running into the waiting room, jumping up and down and yelling "Chelsea, Chelsea, come, come!!!" I follow him as he RAN outside and there stands my sweet Jean, who was home two days earlier than we expected from school! It was such a wonderful surprise, and I loved getting to hug him and tell him how much he was missed. He immediately felt for my bracelet again and said "Wow. Chelsea. You are my best friend and I have missed you. I pray for you every day." I LOVE THAT BOY!

It was also fun to introduce him to the others on the team, and watch as he formed such close friendships with so many of them over the next two weeks.

He is such a special kid, and God has SUCH big plans for his life. We hope to continue helping him with some things he needs that make his life as a visually impaired teenager easier and are so thankful that we get to be a part of his life.

4. Watching God clearly define our purposes as the weeks progressed. I feel like it could be summed up as this:

*HEALING for the sick

*HAPPINESS for the children

*HOPE for the future of Noel and Madame Director

We were amazed to watch these purposes be made clear, as children were healed, illnesses were detected, and many received treatment they needed. There was so much happiness spread through the love of these teams and through the different projects we did with them.

And, we are humbled and excited to be a small part of bringing continual hope and support to the Noel Orphanage in the future. Many plans and discussions were had with Madame Director, and we are thrilled with some of the opportunities we will have to continue our relationships with these sweet children in so many ways.

5. Watching amazing team bonds form.

This is something Mark and I had prayed over daily for months and months! Any time you are leading a team of people who don't all know each other beforehand, it is certainly a concern. But, there was no need for concern here!

Everyone became so close and it still feels weird to not see all of these sweet friends every day now! I pray that life long bonds have been made between people, and that many more trips of service will come from these first trips together.

6. As I mentioned before, I truly loved watching every team member use their specific gifts to bless others. Whether it be coaching the older boys, organizing our crazy supplies, drawing with the older girls, playing games with the toddlers, or playing guitar for the babies, every single person had amazing love to share through their gifts and talents.

It never ceased to amaze me as God would pair up the perfect team member with the perfect child who needed that specific moment of blessing.

None of that was by mistake. It was all perfectly planned, and each member of this team was equally as important and gifted as the next.

7. The Belvedere Hotel. :)

One of the important things to me as we began planning this trip is creating a good environment for sharing and relaxing at the end of our days. The Belvedere was the perfect place to hang {except for the barking dog who chose to stay awake all night and bark and bark and bark.} Other than that, it was a beautiful place, and was a great setting for relaxed dinners, and good conversation. Definitely part of the trip we will always remember.

8. Jane's "home" church!

The second week, our team visited our guide, Jane's, church, where she and her husband work pastoring a sweet, small group of people in their neighborhood. I really don't have words for what this powerful morning was like for our whole team. Tears were streaming down all of our faces, as we joined these spirited Rwandans in prayer and song. And, I have to do a whole other blog about the word from the Lord that I got that morning. He KNEW I desperately needed a reminder that HE is VICTORIOUS over evil and that, therefore, so am I, if I believe!! It was AMAZING and such a God moment for us all.

Jane and Peter are truly some of the most beautiful people I have ever met in my life, and she has played a huge role in these two weeks for us. Not just in coordinating our every meal, bus ride, and shopping stop, but in much bigger, God-sized ways. She has spoken HIS truth when we needed to hear it, and has guided us in the most beautiful, humble way. She relies on the Lord for EVERYTHING in her life, and she is such an example to me.

9. Serving alongside some amazing children!

I know I've already written about my own girls, but the entire team of kids who came with us were AMAZING and really were the hands and feet of Jesus in ways only they could be. Each one had such a perfect place on the team and had such compassionate hearts for the kids at Noel. It was a sweet thing to watch them love and be loved on. :)

10. Watching my husband lead and serve!

What a blessing to partner with him on a trip like this, and after months and months of hard work, to watch him in action! Mark was the runner for everything from money to lost luggage, from supplies or prescriptions to formula and basketball shoes.

Whatever the need was, and for whoever needed it, he was there. And, I loved getting to see pictures of him buying shoes for children he met in the market,

or clearing the shelves of infant formula from the local store, and blessing the store owner with more sales than he would have had all year!

Beyond the errands and organizing he did, I just loved watching his heart for these children most of all.

He connects so easily to these children, and loves them so deeply.

He leads with such passion and heart, and I am SO GLAD I can call him mine!

We consider it a true act of God that He has placed the exact same passion in both of us at the same time in our lives. Doing this together is the BIGGEST blessing, and we keep watching in great anticipation to see what else God will call us to do together for His children!

On a Journey

2011-08-13T04:42:00.020-05:00

So, I'm attempting to catch up on the last three weeks, somehow. This has definitely been a big journey for our family in every way! We were so blessed to take both Kendyll and Carlie with us to Rwanda, while Abby Kate got to travel to Hawaii with Pops and Grandma, and then to "the ranch" with Gammy and Papa Ron.

We all had such amazing adventures, and truly thank God for His provision and protection in each step. {I never want to take each of those things for granted. As Mark said, there were so many little miracles each day, as we were kept safe and healthy and everything went so smoothly. None of that is by chance or accident. Our God guarded us all in every way!}

The day we left for Rwanda and Hawaii was Mark Daddy Daddy's birthday! I had {crazy} intentions to make him our usual birthday breakfast before we headed to the airport, but of course that didn't end up happening, after only two hours of sleep and still more loading and packing to finish.

Lucky for us, Daddy's favorite breakfast also includes powdered donuts. So, he was happy with a plate full of them! (plus some delicious strawberries cut by Katers...it's her specialty!)

My favorite part was the "birthday picture" Kendyll made for him of Rwanda. Mark has spent his last two birthdays in Africa, so we hope it's certainly a tradition that continues.

After giving some BIG HUGE Abby Kate squeezes at the airport, we said goodbye to Grandma and AK, as they began their big Hawaii adventure.

This girl was SOOOO excited about her trip and had been telling us for months that "she was the most special one" of the family. :) I was just so glad she felt special and not like she was left behind!

After some CRAZY airport experiences for our team {have I mentioned how much I love airlines and all of their stickler rules? I think I might have an airline anger problem, actually.}, we finally boarded our flight to RWANDA!

The girls did AMAZINGLY well, and slept almost the whole way.

When they were awake, they spent every minute on their personal movie monitor, which they thought was really the coolest thing ever.

And, from the minute we landed in Rwanda, I loved watching them experience the country we love in every way.

It was so fun for them to have so many friends on this trip too! We have joked that Hollyn and Kendyll now have the best ACU roomie pictures ever. :)

Of course, I wouldn't be telling the whole story if I didn't share the struggles too. I have to admit, I didn't expect my own selfishness to be a problem in bringing my children this time. Mark and I have been to Africa multiple times this year, but never been "mom" and "dad" while we're gone. We've had complete freedom to be mommy and daddy to orphans, and beyond that, to have time with other adults to process what we're experiencing and just to hang out!

So, the first few days were hard for me in this way. It's completely different to have little ones with you who have never experienced so many new things, not to mention that we were with our whole team, whom Mark and I were coordinating and leading. So, there were a lot of different things pulling at us, and I felt lost in all of it. And, I would say that feeling came and went over the whole trip.

God was good though and helped me see it as an opportunity instead of a hindrance. Yes, this was certainly a different kind of trip for me. Little to no time to process or write or think. But, lots of time to watch others fall in love with Rwanda, plenty of opportunities to still be mommy to orphaned ones, as well as get to experience my girls grow and change as they spent time being the hands and feet of Jesus.

And, to get to "do Africa" as a family was SUCH a blessing {although we were certainly missing our littlest}.

It was really neat to see the way God has molded both of my big girls so differently, and how that played a very big part in how they connected and served the children of Noel.

Kendyll was, of course, a total natural.

I've really never doubted that she would be. But, it was SO COOL to watch her work and connect and love like she's always lived here. There was no hesitation or fear in her. Just love.

In fact, many times she just looked at me and said "We've gotta move here." I love that girl. There was only one day when she was ready to go home. The day that Team One was leaving, which meant some of her good friends were going home too. But, the real kicker was when she talked to Abby Kate. She missed her so much, and was ready to hug her. She said "I'm ready to be home, Mom. I miss her so much, I miss water that you can drink from the faucet, I miss not having to worry about malaria...but I love being here too. It's so strange." Boy, was that a great moment. I was so glad to hear her appreciate things like water and told her that she was experiencing something that God wanted her to see, so she can tell others when she is home. I told her that now she knows how mommy and daddy feel when we're away. We long for our children at home, and for the blessings God has given us, but we also don't want to stop doing what God has called us to: loving on His little ones who need to know they are treasured.

Kendyll was so amazing with the kids. Whether it be children her own age, who she held hands with, played games with, or taught songs to...

or the toddlers, who she totally SHINED with--picking them up, sitting and playing, giving hugs and kisses.

She was never worried about their dirty clothes or bare bottoms or germs {I had to force her to worry more about it, actually, and I hated that!}

Jesus tells us to be like children because of their love and faith, and I got such a clear picture of that on this trip. She saw no barriers in her love. There was not a child too dirty, too needy, too different from herself. And, they ALL giggled and laughed and reached and hugged when she was around.

And, OH the babies! She was so in love with the babies!

The first few days, she did really well at following the rules we had set for the kids on the trip, the main one being "always be with an adult". But, by the end of the first week, and certainly by week two, I would look around for her, realizing she was not with the group. And, without fail, I could always immediately find her in the same place: the baby room. She was usually holding her favorite girl, Clementine...or she was helping the mamas feed, bathe, or dress the babies.

She also really enjoyed the medical project, and jumped in on every part of the process. She helped some of us in the waiting room, as we played with the children who were waiting.

She helped walk some of the children through the doctor visit,

and she even got to be a nurse for the day, with Nurse Tracy!

Tracy was SO kind to let her be a part of it, and since Kendyll has always wanted to be a "nurse in Africa", this was absolutely her dream come true.

And, boy did it make this mommy proud. NOT proud because I've had anything to do with her...just proud of how God is using her passions and gifts to bring glory to Himself.

And, oh my sweet Carlie. I knew that this would be a different kind of trip for her, seeing that she was only six years old and has a completely different personality from Kendyll. The first night we arrived in Rwanda, she was doing great! She gobbled up her food {which she continued to do the whole two weeks---she loved the food!}, took her first shower, and excitingly changed to her pj's. And, then it hit her. She was scared. She cried and cried because she was afraid she would accidentally drink the water, or get a mosquito bite. After I sat with her and explained all that I could about why we're careful but why we don't have to walk in fear, she settled down, and went right to sleep. From that point on, she was never scared again. She just has to have "her moment" and then she moves on. :)

She really, REALLY loved the journey to Noel, and had her head out the window of the bus the whole way, taking in every beautiful hill and every beautiful person along the road. I really don't think there was one person she didn't wave to. She even got to be the photographer!

It was pretty shocking when we arrived in Gisenyi and she looked like she had eyeliner on. I couldn't figure out what it was, until I realized it was also in her nose and ears. It was exhaust from the bus in front of us on the road! That's how much she had her head outside! :)

As we arrived at Noel, her "slow to warm" personality came through again. We had explained to all the kids on the trip what those first moments could be like---overwhelming in every way. And, I think we did a pretty good job of painting an appropriate picture for all of them. But, for Carlie, talking about it was nothing like experiencing it. As a hundred children came storming the bus to grab our hands first, she was completely overwhelmed. She gripped me tighter than ever and just cried. But, again, after a while of me carrying her and seeing that these children were sweet and excited, she just all of a sudden got down, wiped her face on her shirt, and began meeting kids. It was so funny to watch her personality yet again. She needs her warm-up time for sure, but then she is just done with it!

Every day after the first one, she wanted to be the first one off the bus to greet the kids. Wow, how God is shaping her heart and making her stronger and stronger for His purposes. I can't wait to see what He does in her life!

As soon as Carlie was ready to meet the kids, she met her sweet friend Bebe, who became "her best friend" for the whole trip. Bebe is four and is just precious.

And, she was exactly the friend that Carlie needed. And, one close friend, is exactly the way Carlie likes it! :)

Carlie was also amazing with the toddlers. And, she was addicted to them on day one.

She has such a quiet way about her, that just draws the children to her. On the very first day, I walked up to see her sitting in a circle with some of the three year olds, who she had organized to sit down that way. She went around the circle, tapping their noses, then patting their hands, then hugging them. And, they all just patiently waited for their turn!

It was so incredibly cute! And, it definitely gave her confidence for the coming days.

She, of course, LOVED the babies too, and got to hold and cuddle with so many of them. She would just sit there looking in their eyes or singing to them. It was precious.

And, then of course, they both got their dream come true moments: tying babies on their backs! So fun! Carlie has little Louisa, who was also a family favorite. :)

The mamas certainly loved Carlie too! They were all fascinated with her blonde hair and blue eyes, so she was cheered every time she would walk into any of the rooms. And, they of course, all wanted pictures with her. :) She got better at smiling for these pictures as the weeks went on. At first, she did NOT like this attention at all.

As I said before, she never complained about the food or the conditions or the long days. I was just so so so proud of her attitude. She did, of course, need "down time" in the middle of her days. And, if she was ever missing, I could find her in a corner somewhere coloring or drawing by herself, or with Bebe. :)

She did have many times where she would take two or three little ones into the guest house and just do something with a few of them.

It was sweet to watch them color together, or play playdough, or paint nails, just one on one.

They even gave some of the little girls shoes when they got the chance to.

It was really what this is all about. Connecting deeply. Communicating one by one to these kids that they were special and treasured and loved.

And, all of the kids on this trip did it in ways we adults never could!

Overall, I could not believe how well they did. We asked alot of them, and they shined. I did feel like I was more on edge than usual and I'm sure our team felt that at times! When your kids are being loud or talking too much to tired adults...when they don't wash their hands and pop a handfull of cheez-its in their mouth...or when they run off without asking. I know I was sometimes too quick to correct, but I'm praying none of that changed their experience too much.

I know this was the first of many trips, and I hope and pray none of us ever forget where our journey began...

Thank you, God, for Your faithfulness to my children. May they grow to serve You in places like this their whole lives, glorifying You with the gifts and talents and personalities You have given them!

Rwanda!!

2011-07-28T01:17:00.004-05:00

Oh my, I am so sorry to those who has asked about the blog! I never intended to wait this long to give an update. For some reason, Facebook is so much easier to work with on a limited internet connection, so you can find all of our pictures from the last couple of days there (www.facebook.com/hischase).

And, of course, as I head out the door for another day at Noel, I'm short on time...and words.

There is so much to tell you about our first few days! There have been moments where I just stop and stare at our medical team at work. They are AMAZING and to think God formed this group exactly as it needed to be...wow, it's humbling and awesome to see. They have already seen quite a few children who need follow-up treatment or surgery, so we are praying about what will come from this first trip.

And, as the doctors and nurses share their gifts and talents, I'm also so impressed with the rest of our group, who are supporting and assisting in every single way possible. We have an amazing team of "office staff" who are creating and organizing medical files on every single child at Noel, taking pictures of the children for identification purposes, entering their info into a computer database, and labeling their files for the nurses here to use them easily. It is QUITE the job and they are doing it tirelessly. And, these tasks are going to change the lives of these children. It is giving them hope and a future. It gives them an identity as a single child, who is important and worthy of attention. I love what God is doing here...even through manila folders, sharpies, and growth charts. Every single bit of it is so significant in these efforts.

We also have a great set-up in the waiting room area, where we are getting to do a little developmental play with each age group who comes through, as well as some medical play to prepare them for visiting the doctors. It is so sweet to watch them do things all of our own kids do every day without a thought. But, as they play, I watch their smiles. I watch their bodies relax. I listen to the giggles. Bubbles are a reason to jump and laugh. Baby dolls that coo and say "mama" are met with amazement. Mr. Potato Heads just blow their minds! As these children rock the babies, listen to their own voices through the stethoscopes, get stickers and silly bands, build blocks, play Mr. Potato Head, and just BE CHILDREN, my heart can hardly take it!! It brings tears to my eyes to watch. As a former play therapist, I see such potential for their hearts and minds as they are allowed to communicate, learn, and be nurtured through toys and play. And, of course, it is just heartbreaking to watch as the two year olds come in and just hold a toy in their hands, not knowing how to truly PLAY anything. As we began to show them what dot paint was for, or how to roll the car across the floor, I thought once again, how wonderful it is that our team is here to be mommies and daddies, and teach them how to build a tower or kiss their baby doll, or play games.

And, of course, there are no words for how proud I am of each and every kid who came on this trip with us. They are doing AMAZINGLY well and are reaching these children of Noel in ways we never could as adults. They jumped right in and have played all day long...whether it be Ridge and Judd playing soccer or running around with the boys, or Natalie and Emily teaching new songs and dance moves to the girls, or my own two girls sitting and coloring or holding a baby as they get an exam....it's all just more than I can describe. Every single one of them have jumped in and helped in every way, with whatever is needed. They haven't complained, and in fact, many have said they are ready to live here! I love what the Lord does through the hearts of children, and I pray over each one of them that this is the beginning of a long road of service for each one of their lives.

As we head out for another day of medical exams and playtime, we covet your prayers over our team's health, as well as these children's health. A few of us have some upset stomachs, which I'm sure will be healed easily. But, some of the kids we are seeing need the healing touch of God in their lives. Please pray with us for the health of these kids. We meet today with some of the mamas and Madame Director about a few changes the doctors see as key to improving the lives of these children, so we also pray that these suggestions are taken well, and that our hearts are seen in our words...that we don't do this because we know better or know more or don't appreciate how incredibly HARD they work for these kids. But, only because we love these kids and want the absolute best for them.

Oh, wow. I have skipped so much. So many individual stories about kids I've spent time with, or team members on this trip and their servant hearts. Those are coming, I promise!!! With this internet connection, we may not have daily updates like I had hoped...but we're storing it all up and will share it soon!

For those of you who have donated to this trip, please know that EVERY SINGLE DAY, these kids are receiving blessing from what you gave. We have had the opportunity to do more than we even hoped for, and it is because of YOU. You are loving these kids even from afar and we could not do this without you!

300 Donations AND the Beach...What a Week!!

2011-07-16T23:27:00.001-05:00

I wish blogger would come up with a new feature. It would be really, REALLY nice for blogs to appear based on your thoughts about them...you know, telepathic blogging! Or maybe even after you view the pictures you took on a vacation, they just magically appear on the blog with captions? Can't someone technical figure out how that could happen?

I would be a much better and more consistent blogger, that's for sure!

So, we did this for four days this week:

And, it was SO nice to relax with my sisters and their sweet kids (and hubbies). It was a wonderful few days away, and it consisted of sitting by the beach, laying out in the sun (which some sisters may have done too long), eating yummy meals at our beach house, sleeping really soundly after days in water and sun, swimming in the pool and ocean, boogie boarding on great waves, and digging in the sand. Pretty good week, for sure!

Abby Kate LOVED boogie boarding, although she preferred the SKULL boogie board the most, which we borrowed from the home owners' garage. I don't even know what to think about this. She called it HER boogie board all week. :)

But at least she writes sweet things like "I love Mommy" in the sand...she was so proud to surprise me!

After working for hours, we finally finished our awesome sand castle, complete with windows and bridges and stairs!

Ha! Just kidding! Some people had a sandcastle building class right next to us, so we staged a few shots for kicks. :)

Oh my, I love these cousins so much. They were so stinkin' cute spending the week together!

And, seriously. Have you ever seen a cuter beach buddy than this guy? Brewer was the best baby ever and just chillaxed in the shade.

After a few wonderful days laying on the beach, swimming in the ocean, and eating way too much food, it was time to get back to work on the Rwanda trip and on the preparation that is still underway for our team!

And, guess what I found out when I returned home?

WE HAVE MET OUR GOAL OF 300 DONATIONS FOR NOEL!!

43 days ago, we launched a campaign to fund some major initiatives at Noel Orphanage this summer. It was our biggest financial campaign yet, and we asked for 300 people to give $50, for a total of $15,000 to use for medicine, hygiene, food, and developmental needs for orphans. There were days in the last couple of weeks that I honestly wasn't sure we would make it. But, as He always does, He provided! As of Thursday, we had 301 donations!! He is faithful, and YOU are faithful to listen to His call. Thank you for making it possible to not only have the $15,000 in funds, but because of some dear generous hearts who I love SO MUCH, we have an additional $10,000 matching fund to add to that!

So, in 43 days, we have $25,050 for the children of Noel, with a week to spare!

When I wondered if we could raise it this time...when I doubted that people wanted to hear from us again about a campaign for money...when I prayed and asked repeatedly if this really was His plan...He said "Trust me. I have this." And He did.

He has this whole thing in His hands. But, He is still gentle enough to remind me again when I forget.

And, speaking of the whole "reminding-me-repeatedly-that-He's-in-control" thing...He's had to do it again this week. :)

Mark and I have each been to Africa three times in the last year. Not one of those trips did I get nervous or worried about what we had decided to do. Sure, I KNOW all the things that can happen on a trip like this, and I know that if I let myself "go there", I would find of plenty of reasons to worry. But, I can't even begin to describe the peace that has settled over our hearts and minds on every single trip. Worry just hasn't been an issue at all. And, He has been faithful to protect and sustain us.

But, this time it has been a bit different for me.

Sure, I have been to Africa. But, I haven't been responsible for a team of people before. I haven't taken my children before. And, I haven't been keenly aware of how many ridiculous little details have to line up for a trip like this to happen with 40+ people.

So, I'll be honest. The last two days have suddenly had some streaks of worry. Questions pop in my head. I lie awake at night just praying verse after verse about God's protection and faithfulness, just trying to shake off the anxiety...trying to remember that the God who whispers "Trust Me", is in full control, even when I'm not.

The other morning, I woke up before 6, thinking. And, praying. I have certain passages "hidden in my heart" about this topic, because it used to be an even bigger problem for me. So, as I am laying there praying for safety as we travel, for the children we will serve, for God to go before us...I start reciting my usual: "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God..." As I continued the verse, God stopped me in my tracks, and just gave me Isaiah 40. We had memorized it earlier in the school year, and I started saying it out loud.

"To whom will you compare me, or who is my equal? says the Holy One. Lift your eyes and look to the heavens! Who created all these? He who brings out the starry host and calls them each by name. Because of HIS GREAT POWER AND MIGHTY STRENGTH NOT ONE OF THEM IS MISSING!! Do you not know, Chelsea? Have you not heard, Chelsea? The LORD is the EVERLASTING GOD, the Creator of the ends of the earth! He does not grow tired or weary, and His understanding no one can fathom! He gives STRENGTH to the WEARY and increases the POWER of the WEAK! Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall. But, those who HOPE IN THE LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles, they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."

Thank you, Lord. You're right. I trust you. :)

We ARE trusting Him. He has everything in His capable hands. And, He is going before us, even as we prepare to leave in ONLY SIX MORE DAYS!!! Unbelievable.

Now, the next blog is going to be about some of the AMAZING people who have been so generous with their time, talents, and resources to bless this trip. I hope to have it up in the next couple of days.

But, you know, if telepathic blogging would be invented, I could have had it done two weeks ago!

Fill Our Beds...Fill Our Hearts

2011-06-25T23:12:00.011-05:00

The last week has been quite a transition around this house. For last year's birthday gift, Kendyll asked for a new "big girl" room. She asked all of her family for different pieces of the room, and Mom and Dad's job was to get her a bed and paint the walls.

But, due to a few different factors (the main one being a hopeful mommy who thought she might be moving to Africa), the bed was never bought and the walls were never painted.

Fast forward to last week. I decided to totally rock Kendyll's world, and surprise her with a complete room makeover while she was gone to camp. It was like a happy birthday surprise 6 months later...

So, after a couple of days of sewing, and a day of painting (just kidding...I paid someone else to do it), we were ready for the big reveal. And, boy was she SURPRISED!!!I was hiding out in her new room, while Mark told her I needed her upstairs in Chase's room. (Yes, we still call it Chase's room and Chase's bathroom.) Little did she know we had transformed his sweet room into a NEW sweet room for our biggest girl.

As you can tell by the faces, she was blown away and so so so excited.

As I suspected, Carlie was a bit disappointed to come home to her same old room and same old bed. But, it was good practice in patience and in being happy for someone else who had waited a long time for her birthday gift. :)

And, as Kendyll always does, she was quick to find a way to include her sisters, which was so sweet. She wrote them invitations to a sleepover in her room that night, to which they both wrote a response: YES!

Although it didn't end up being an all-nighter (Carlie decided that her bed actually sounded pretty good, after a week at camp!) it still made the sisters much more excited about the new room. :)

Now, as you can tell, this week also held some transition for this mommy and daddy's heart as well. We took apart our baby boy's room that has been sitting for almost two years.

Two years?! That even sounds strange to ME! I don't know how it took this long. It wasn't really because we couldn't part with it...It was simply because I didn't know what else to do with it. And, it was familiar to all of us.

Moving Chase's things was okay for me, I guess because I knew it was coming and because it is not painful for me to be among his things. Being in his room does not make me sad, as much as it makes me just wistful for him. Does that even make sense? I long for the day when I see him again, and that's kind of where I am resting now.

So, we packed up the bedding, the toys, and the clothes. I bought a cedar chest for all of his special things, so I still have a special place for the keepsakes. And, we just moved the baby bed into the room down the hall, to continue waiting for the little one who will join our family someday.

I've finally decided to take some of his tiny clothes to a sweet little boy named Gabe in Rwanda, who my friend Jana is raising right now. (Read his story here. It's amazing.) It feels good to send these little things to tiny Gabe, knowing that these clothes will go from one little world-changer to another. :)

As Mark was moving toys that Chase would have been playing with right now, we did get a little sad. And, we talked often over the last few days about saying goodbye to his room.

This is hard to explain...but even though we were sad about that, I think what made me cry was just having extra space in our house.

I know that sounds weird, but I have prayed all week for God to FILL UP the rooms of this house. We now have two empty beds...a baby bed and a twin bed. Kendyll is in a new double bed, so there just seems to be more room than ever.

And, I don't like that.

I can't even bear it, actually.

I want my rooms to be full. I want our beds to be full. I want God to "expand our family and enlarge our love", as I say on my adoption blog.

So, my heart is truly aching right now. It has been a hard few days.

I picture the orphans I have visited and the tiny beds they share with other children. I see them with no pillow. Nothing to call their own. Then, I look around this now empty bedroom, and just BEG God to fill it with sweet children who deserve and need a bed---and a pillow--and a family---of their own.

As I moved each toy, and each blanket, and each picture frame, I prayed over the one who will play with, sleep under, and be pictured in each. I prayed that he or she will know deep within that we are here and we love them.

The real "kicker" this week has been my friend Tara arriving at Noel. I have been talking with her over texts the last couple of days, and it is all I can do not to jump on a plane today and be there too. She is already making such an incredible impact and experiencing God's sweet presence in the midst of this overcrowded orphanage.

And, yesterday she told me that she had gone to hold my little Vestine. Ahhhh!!! This is the precious girl who I held, talked to, sang to, and prayed over. And, she has absolutely stolen my heart.

Tara's text said "I saw Vestine today! She is still small and precious. She doesn't like me much; she was scared. I'll win her over. :)"

Just those few sentences have been running through my mind and I have pictured her a thousand times today, laying in that bed, lined up among dozens of other children...I keep picturing the big smile I got when I came back the second day to hold her again, hoping to see it again in just a few weeks. :)

Oh man. I can hardly handle it.

I just don't know how to live both places. I cried to Mark about it this morning, as we drove to run the usual errands. I cried about it again over lunch at Tin Star.

Oh, and Mark wanted me to also add a picture of when HE met Vestine a few months later. :) I love the serious way she is checking out his face. Precious.

I miss these sweet feet. I can't WAIT to be there in just 28 days.

And, at the very same time, I'm so incredibly thankful for this boy's sweet feet, who inspired it all.

Sigh.

Such a time of transition. Such a time of patient waiting. Such a time of gentle (and not so gentle) trusting. Such a time of longing.

But, even still, it's also such a time of joy.

"You love Him even though you have not seen Him. Though you do not see Him now, you trust Him; and you rejoice with a glorious, inexpressible joy." I Peter 1:8

Meeting Dinkenesh...and other Adoption News!

2011-06-22T23:23:00.002-05:00

{For adoption news***we're approved!**, visit my adoption blog HERE**we're approved!**It has the latest news we just received today**we're approved!**and some of the other thoughts swirling around in my head**we're approved!**And, now on with the blog!**we're approved!}

We had quite the treat last week, as we gathered for a swim party with some of our friends who are in the process of adopting. But, this wasn't any old swim party. We were there to meet a precious girl who we've loved and prayed for from afar for months: Dinkenesh Sanderson!

My good friend, Jaime, began the road of adoption a couple of months after we did. Through emails and conversations, we shared quite a bit of the early journey, and I loved watching how quickly God called and led Jaime and Murray right into the heart of adoption for their family. He wasted no time in breaking their hearts and bringing their precious girl to them, and it is SUCH a miracle every time I get to meet a family who has been made complete through the blessing of adoption.

It was such a fun day with Dinkenesh, and it made us all smile to think of where she is now, compared to what her life would have been otherwise. She spent the whole afternoon swimming, eating cheeseburgers, yelling "DADDY!" at the top of her lungs as she jumped to him, and laughing so hard as she played with a pool full of kids, who became her instant friends.

And, of course, my girls were IN LOVE. They couldn't get enough of little miss Dinks.

It was also an incredible blessing to sit with these girls, and talk about the serious ins and outs and ups and downs of being adoptive mothers. To have a place to safely talk about all the joys and struggles and fears and doubts and blessings, all the time knowing they absolutely understand...it was really nice.

(This picture is supposed to have YOU TOO, HEATHER! Somehow I didn't get that one?!)

We had a great time catching up with old friends, and making new ones with little Dinkenesh. She is an answered prayer and an encouragement to all of us to keep pressing on and praying our way through this waiting time. Because at the end of the wait, is a CHILD who was planned long ago for our family, and who will be blessed...but, more than that, will be a BLESSING to us and the people around us, just like Dinks. We're so glad you're HOME, sweet girl!

An Important Day!

2011-06-21T12:36:00.006-05:00

Whoa. Watch out, y'all. I'm doing multiple blogs in one day.

This one's a very important one that could not wait another day.

Because today's a very special day. In just a few hours...

This friend who I love: {tara}

Is going to this place that I love: {rwanda}

To love on some kids who I love: {at noel}

And, as she goes, she is inspiring everyone who stands in her path to say YES to the Lord in new ways.

I will never forget the morning I woke up to read Tara's late-night Facebook message to me just a week after we were home from our Visiting Orphans trip to Rwanda...

"I have been an absolute mess since I got home. I know God is calling me and I feel like he is calling me to move to Rwanda, but I have no idea what that means. I have no idea what to do. You have been on my mind alot....I remember you saying a couple of times that God is very bold and direct when it comes to His orphans and I have been praying."

Oh, to think how much was to come after this simple surrender before the Lord. This was just the beginning of a truly BOLD walk with the Lord over the next few months, as He made it crystal clear to Tara what her call was. And, Tara followed every step of the way.

My sweet, amazing, selfless friend is now moving to Rwanda to live at the Noel Orphanage and minister to the children there. Did you hear that?

She is moving HERE.

To love on these kids.

To do everyday things that these kids MISS OUT on.

She'll give hugs, teach girls to crochet, tell them they're special, teach them new songs, share the few clothes she is taking with them, paint their nails...

And, more than anything, she'll be AVAILABLE. For what the Lord already has planned for these kids. For what the Lord already has planned for her. She is going to be living life alongside these kids, and able to know what they need. {And, you can follow along on her journey, by the way...Her blog is amazing.}

Now...Tara is not so different than any of you who are reading this. She is a young, creative, fun girl with lots of friends and a family who loves her very much, who could have easily made all kinds of excuses to stay here in predictable USA, and just make a convenient trip or two back to Rwanda over the next few years.

But, instead, she has chosen His way for her life. He has said "Come and follow me" and she has simply spoken a faith-filled YES in response.

Tonight, she will walk away from this American life and take up the call that the Lord whispered in her ear earlier this year.

And, I can't begin to tell you how proud I am to be her friend. She inspires me and encourages me in ways I can't put into words. It's actually hard to believe that we didn't even know each other before our hearts were joined together while loving orphans back in January.

Tara, I love you and your huge heart. I love knowing that this is JUST the beginning of what God has planned for you...plans to bless you, and to give you a hope and a future, in ways we who stay behind could never imagine. Thank you for the example you are setting for so many others. Thank you that my children love you and know you and pray for you. Thank you that THEY are learning what it means to "abandon it all for the sake of the call" because of your great faith and example.

We are covering you in prayer. And......WE'LL SEE YOU IN RWANDA, BABY!!!